It is very difficult for a normal healthy active male to be celibate. He would be celibate only under the following conditions:
1. No opportunities for him to slip.
2. All his senses are protected from sexual stimuli. In our current society, this condition is almost impossible to achieve for a person living a normal life.
It must be easier for girls to be celibate than for guys. At least they behave as if it is.
Disclaimer: There are exceptions to all of the above.
Sentiments: I feel sad for people who are deprived of loving intimacy. It is one of our fundamental needs - like food, water, air, clothing, shelter. No one should be deprived of it.
Posts
There's no need to feel bad for Buddhist monks who are celibate, but yet one of the happiest people on earth, as shown by MRI.
ReplyDeleteI'd think that more important that being celibate is the reason for being celibate.
I agree with the author above, that is is very difficult and almost impossible for a normal healthy male to be celibrate unless he has no chances. It is as difficult for females too, although they don't get as eagerly sexual as guys which is why it isn't that obvious.
ReplyDeleteAs for amit's comment above, regarding the Buddhist monks, I don't think a person who has a normal libido and need for sex would choose to live a life of celibacy by being a monk and still be happy. Either they would have a way of sexual expression that is yet to be explained or they have a low drive for sex psychologically or physiologically.
The rampant incidents where 'celibate' Catholic 'brothers' and 'fathers' use children and gullible young women as a method of sexual fulfillment pretty much explains it. And these things, when they happen in India are often hushed up for either inability to fight a legal battle or fear of social stigma. But they do exist, and are very common. Perhaps forcing preists to be celibate isn't much a good idea after all...
Aberforth,
ReplyDeleteOnce again thanks for the comment and bringing my attention back to this post.
Since I wrote this post, I have had an additional epiphany: it is possible to be celibate when your heart and mind are totally (almost to the exclusion of everything else) devoted to some cause. I have gone through months and months of celibacy, not just in actions but even in thoughts - did not desire or even think of sex, when I was fretting about a rocky long-distance relationship.
LL
You're welcome.
ReplyDeleteThat could be attributed to supression of testosterone by other hormones or psychological reasons. Generally, when we are depressed or worried, our sex drive tends to be lower than normal so we can manage without sex easier. Apart from some medical drugs that interfere with sex drives, of course. For normal healthy males with normal libidos, celibacy would be extremely difficult, if not impossible.
The question if celibacy is possible remains unresolved for me. I have tried celibacy from the age of 20 to 25. I am a man of very high libido. What I did was watch what is happening with my sex energy.After a few months sex disappeared. Then the energy started coming up. The energy started filling up my belly like a lake.The feeling was like you are standing in a lake. So thick was the energy and it kept pouring and pouring. This had other effects too.The world started transforming.Soon I was living in heaven. Each moment new worlds opened up for me. With so much energy it was frightening but if you live through it a new world opens up.. The women looked like angels but the sexual attraction was not there. The whole world was transformed into something heavenly and things were burning with beauty. Then my third eye started working. A contineous sensation is felt there. I felt that things are happening the way I think. There were so many women interested in me. But I did not think of taking it any further. If they are with me enjoy the moment of togetherness and forget it. But things collapsed. There was one girl with whom I had good rapport. When we were together she proposed and I thought that it was risky from that height. I closed and withdrew myself.. Something moved inside and I tried to stop it. It happened that in left half of my body the energy flowed and at the right hand side it got choked. I was seeing the world differntly from my two eyes. One eye was showing a heavenly picture and the other a hellish one. The side were the energy got struck up nearly paralysed.I was split from then on. It took 12 years for it to become somewhat normal. I spent 12 years like a zombie mostly lying around. Now also nothing is ok. Buty looks like the horrible phase is over. So it is risky to be celibate. But is it possible if you approach it in a systematic way. I am still looking for the answer. It is clear that by stopping sex you can be powerful, supernaturally powerful. Also women will be attracted to you. But you shouldn't stop it by force. You should be able to absorb the power of sex and learn to live with that power.
ReplyDeletePeter,
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for stopping by and sharing your experience with us. You seem to have gone through some remarkable experiences.
LL
To be celibate is possible.
ReplyDeleteHere are my experiences:
http://healthycelibacy.blogspot.com/
Best Wishes.
Great Lessons indeed
ReplyDeleteSex is NOT a need like food, water, shelter and clothing....it is a DESIRE that you can choose to live without. I don`t understand people that say sex is a "'need".....that is not true. I`ve been celibate 2 years now and couldn`t care less if I ever has sex again. I gave it up for religious reasons.Yes,in a world full of filth like pornography, it was easy for me to let it go. Sex is a desire that can get you in a lot of trouble. Dating websites are just games people play. I`d rather devote my life to God.
ReplyDelete