Loneliest thing I have done

I am used to doing things alone. Most of the times. I don't usually have buddies interested in the same things as I am. So, for most of my life, I have been going to places or events alone, and then making friends there. I never really minded it. In fact, I liked making new varieties of friends, in new places.

I am now sitting in a clinic for my immigration medical exam (and blogging on my phone). There are couple of other Indian guys here. They both seem to be here with their wives. Both wives are good looking. As I sit here and listen to them having their idiosyncratic conversations that don't really mean anything, I realize that this immigration thing is the most lonely thing I have doing in my life.

I personally don't know anyone who is doing this alone. Most Indians are married by the time they reach this stage in their immigration process. They do it with their spouses.

I am not feeling lonely only because I am doing this alone. I'm feeling lonely more because I realize that this immigration thing has the potential to put some serious distance between the Love of My Life and myself. Each step, each form, each activity in this process is depressing and tortuous.

I had pretty much accepted that this step would come about 3-4 years from now. But the state department advanced the dates by a huge deal. Why did this have to come now, in the middle of everything else I'm dealing with??