Thursday, November 15, 2007

Suggestions for Bangalore Metro Rail

I recently came across an article which said that the Bangalore Metro Rail is soliciting suggestions from the general public for the train station design. I sent them the following suggestions. You too can email them your suggestions: bmrcl@dataone.in.

Suggestions for the train stations:
  • Please design every train station so that people are encouraged to follow queue system. This is especially necessary for buying tickets.

  • Please install 2 to 4 automatic ticket vending machines at every station. These machines should be able to accept cash and credit cards.

  • Please encourage local artists & poets to design decorations for the stations. They can design benches, shades, wall decorations, posters with short poems, etc. Please don't cover every available part of the station with commercial advertisements only.

  • Please also design major stations to have LCD screens which show:
    1. Train and bus time-tables.
    2. A dynamic map of Bangalore (similar to Google maps) showing the location of all trains and major buses in real time, using GPS technology.

  • Please install security cameras at all the railway stations. These cameras should record 24 X 7. Recordings more than one week old can be erased.

  • Please also design 'park and ride' type of train stations, especially near out-lying areas. These should be stations which provide ample and secure parking place for people to park their vehicles there and use the train to commute. If necessary, these parking areas can be restricted to people who use the train daily - employed people and students.

Suggestions for the trains themselves:
  • Please install security cameras INSIDE the train compartments. These cameras should also record 24X7. Impose strict fines and penalties on anybody who damages or defaces train property.

  • Please design a maintenance center where EVERY train compartment will be washed and cleaned EVERYDAY, both INSIDE and OUTSIDE. Please don't allow the compartments to gather dirt like the Indian railways trains.

I hope Bangalore Metro Rail Corporation is seriously looking into these and similar suggestions from the general public. I hope at least a few of these will be implemented.

Sunday, November 04, 2007

Wipro BPO's employee in Pune is raped and murdered

Came across a gruesome piece of news this evening. Not able to get it out of my head.


Edited on 12/13/2012 with the following note: The original version of this article contained partial quotes from the below linked articles with proper link attribution. I consider this fair-use and not scraped content as defined by Google. Yet, Google informed me that this violates their policies. Therefore, I removed the quoted portions of the articles. You can read the full articles from the links below.


Wipro staffer raped, killed in Yahoo! News

BPO shocker exposes lapses in Telegraph India

Wipro cabbie not new to crime, say cops in Times of India

BPO cabbies' profiles not checked in Times of India

This news is particularly chilling for us (myself and thousands of other Indians) because we have female siblings, relatives and friends who work in Indian tech industry, travelling at odd hours in cabs and rickshaws. Just like the boyfriend of the victim in this latest incident, we have been on the phone with our relatives and friends, while they travelled to or from their offices at odd hours. It is all too easy to imagine the worst happening to our near and dear ones...

It is not just the female employees who are in danger. Just this morning, I read several reports of male employees of tech companies in Bengalooru being assualted, kidnapped and murdered for their money. Some of these incidents involved crimbes by drivers of cabs for the companies of the victims.

In Dec 2005, when writing about another rape and murder incident of a BPO employee in Bangalore, I had quoted Wipro's measures to ensure the safety of their employees as a good example of what should be done. Ironically, this latest incident has happened despite those measures being in place. Rules and processes are only as good as how well they are practiced.

Being a tech industry insider I know that not all rules and processes are followed - this includes even the processes that are part of our core work. Over a period of time, things become lax, omissions and errors creep in. Every company's management is aware of this. As such, Wipro (and other companies) should have more stringent reviews and audits in place to ensure that the rules which affect the physical security of their employees should be practiced with no lapses.

I know that the rules governing the security of the office locations, gates, access to certain areas, cameras inside the office, etc. are very stringently practiced in Wipro. So, it is difficult to understand how in the matter of employee's physical safety, there could have "been a criminal manipulation of our processes", as admitted by T K Kurien, Wipro BPO's president himself.

But I am not blaming the company alone. Every individual also has a responsibility to be extra vigilant and take precautions for personal safety. The lamentable and ineffective state of law enforcement and judicial system in India makes criminals incredibly brazen, almost to the point of being stupid. Yet, they get away with their crimes more often than not, which is what makes them so brazen and reckless. In such an atmosphere nobody can afford to be careless when it comes to personal safety.

The perpetrators of this crime should get the most stringent punishment and hope they get it soon. The criminal of the 2005 rape and murder case in Bengalooru I referred to earlier, has still not been sentenced, while the trial proceedings drag on. This despite that case being pursued in a 'fast track' manner by the court system!

Hopefully, this incident makes everyone extra vigilant.

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Do engineers in Google India work in pairs?

I have a theory that Google's engineers in India mostly work in pairs. You know, like how soldiers or cops in certain units usually work in pairs. I think each Indian Google engineer is paired with a colleague and together they work on tasks/assignments.

Why do I suspect this? I have been following the Official Google Blog for a long time now. I have noticed that posts by Indian engineers are usually attributed to two individuals. I have very rarely seen non-Indian Googlers authoring blog posts in pairs. Non-Indian Googlers almost always write blog posts alone, as individuals.

As of today, a quick Reader search of the Official Google blog's feed for the word 'India' returns 15 posts, of which 7 posts are made by people with Indian-sounding names. Of these 7 posts, 4 posts are made by pairs of Indians and 3 posts by lone Indians. I realize that this is not the most accurate way to count and analyze the posts. But I could not find an easier way to search (any suggestions?) for:
1. Only posts made by Indians.
2. Only posts made by more than one author.

There do exist posts by Indian Googlers writing alone. But it is just as likely to see an Indian Googler posting along with another Indian colleague. And like I said earlier, it is very rare to see non-Indian Googlers writing blog posts in pairs. So, I suspect that the Indian engineers work on projects in pairs, and then end up writing about those projects on the official blog, also in pairs.

If you work for Google in India (or even in other Google locations) or if you know someone who works for Google India, would you confirm if my suspicion is true? If it is true, then why is it so? Why do only Indian engineers in Google work in pairs and not others?

Pssst... The chances of hearing from someone at Google in response to speculative posts about internal stuff is none to zero. So, non-Googlers too feel free to speculate in the comments! :-)

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

To love a girl...

To love a girl...

  • Is to see the picture of a beautiful place and immediately think of your girl because:
    a. You want to share the beauty of the picture with her.
    b. You want to visit the place with her.

  • Is to find yourself putting up with an inconvenient situation, and thinking that, "If my girl was with me in this situation, I would not put up with it. I would change it at once so that she would not have to go through this inconvenience!"

  • Is to be casually looking at cell phones for sale online, and then unconsciously picking and choosing handsets and plans for your girl, for the time "when she will be here."

  • Is for your girl to be the last person you think of when you fall asleep, and the first person you think of when you wake up, no matter what the time to sleep or wake up is.

  • Is to accept & assume without a second thought that you will start drinking coffee daily when your coffee-drinking girl is with you, although you are not a habitual coffee drinker, and have infact resisted picking up the habit until now.

  • Is to decide that you will never drink and drive when she is with you, for the sake of her safety. And, not even when she is not with you, to save her the bother of you getting in trouble. You were the guy who never before hesitated to drive after a drink or two!

  • Is to know simply and undeniably, without a sliver of doubt, that the celestial maiden Menaka herself would not be able to tempt you right now, if she were to appear in front of you, because you are committed to your girl.

  • To be in a state of tense desperation, due to circumstances, yet showing a cool & quiet face to your girl, because you don't want her to feel pressurized or disturbed.

  • Is for every cell of your being, your heart to want her to be close to you, yet you hold back on expressing any want because she needs time and space.

  • Is to be a hard ass, a bad ass, even an asshole to the rest of the world, but to be a docile donkey to your girl, cuz you don't like to see her upset.

  • Is to run out of ideas and energy when she is not in your life, but to be full of inspiration and prolific creativity when she is there with you.

  • Is to want to be totally generous with her and not hold anything back.

  • Is to prepare your furnitures, home, heart and all your immediate surroundings with her in mind, although she is thousands of miles away; to infuse the landscape you live in with thoughts of her, so that it reminds you of her and makes you miss her... although she has never seen that landscape herself.


PS: The above sentiments were recorded at different times in late June and early July 2007... except for the last point, which was expressed more recently.

Double-tailed Lizard



See anything unusual about the lizard in the above picture? Yes, it is a double-tailed lizard! The end of its tail is split in two. In fact, the longer of the two split ends is growing another tiny branch. So, this lizard could be triple-tailed pretty soon.

I saw this lizard in my dentist's office in Bengalooru and clicked the photo on my Blackberry. Hence, the bad photo quality. Incidentally, this type of lizards are pretty common in Indian homes and shops, although I have never seen a double-tailed one before. They are pretty harmless to humans, and in fact, help by eating up insects.

Symbiosis: Monkey & Goat



Noticed this interesting sight during a recent visit to Chilkur, near Hyderabad, in Andhra Pradesh, India. There were a few goats lounging around, and this monkey coolly walked upto one of them and settled down comfortably in close contact. I watched in surprise and amusement as the monkey proceeded to pick ticks and fleas from the goat's coat and pop 'em in its mouth, while the goat continued to rest quite undisturbed!

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

21 Tips to my 21-year-old Self

I will be 31 very soon. If I could go back 10 years and meet my 21-year-old self, what advice would I impart to him based on the past 10 years of my life? The following for sure:
  1. True love is built over a period of time, by two people who reciprocate the feelings and share many experiences together, both good and bad. That kind of relationship is worth your heart-break and heart-ache, if it does not eventually work out. A relationship in which you are the only person who is in love, while the other person does not reciprocate similar feelings, is not love in its true, real sense. It is just infatuation. Even if your feelings are extremely intense, sincere and earnest, it is still just infatuation. It is okay to feel a little disappointed and sad if such a one-way infatuation does not pan out, but it is certainly not worth your heart-break and heart-ache.

  2. Even if the person reciprocates your feelings of sincere infatuation and affection, in their own way, but the two of you don't actually have a relationship, don't even call each other lovers or partners, don't spend time together, sharing the good things and the bad things which life has to offer, then it is not a true love relationship. It is just a two-way infatuation. If this does not turn into a true relationship, there is still no need to go through overwhelming heart-ache and heart-break. A little more disappointment and sadness is alright.

  3. Never take more than three steps closer to someone you are interested in, without them reciprocating. In fact, the ideal situation is where both of you simultaneously, or at least alternatively, move closer towards each other taking one equal step at a time. But life is rarely ideal. You being a man, there will be many occasions when you have to take a few more steps closer to a woman, before she will take one step closer to you. Never let these 'few more steps' exceed three steps at any point of time. This is especially important at the beginning of the relationship when you barely know the woman. Don't throw yourself at her and pursue her unless she shows suitable interest and reciprocation. Of course, later on, when the loving partnership is steadily and firmly established, throw these calculations out the window and be totally generous and uncalculative with your beloved.

  4. Women who don't express an interest in you during those first three steps, will almost never become interested in you later on. There seems to be an antenna in men and women, especially so in women, which subconsciously tells them very early on, whether they might pursue a relationship with someone. So, don't spend a lot of time and energy taking more than three steps towards someone who does not want to take even one step towards you. Don't think that you will not find love unless you work hard and take a lot of steps towards a lot of women. You don't need to. Repeat: YOU DON'T NEED TO.

  5. You will come across women who will admire you and love you, simply for who you are, just for the way you normally live, talk and behave. With the woman who is right for you, you don't have to do anything different or extra, or put in a lot of hardwork and pain to make things work. Things will just work out naturally. All that you need to do is be yourself. Being yourself should include being sincere, being truthful, being clean and nice.

  6. When a woman is interested in you, she will let you know. If she admires you or loves you, you will know. If she wants a relationship with you, that will become obvious to you soon enough. So, never ever deceive yourself with thoughts such as: "May be she will become interested in me, if I do this or that"; "May be she is interested in me, but just does not realize it herself"; "May be she wants me, but is simply not showing it"; "May be if I can convince her or just work a little harder, I can win her over"; etc.

  7. You are smart, handsome, loving and love-able. There will be many women who think so. Even if you don't hear it from them aloud, you are all those things. So, don't pursue women, desperately seeking your own self-validation. Don't think that you are not handsome or love-able, just because someone you are infatuated with does not reciprocate your feelings. Don't think you are not all these things just because you don't have a girlfriend or a partner yet. There will be women who think you are all these and more, and who will love you for who you are. And, insha-allah, you will have that partner, who is right and perfect for you, who will admire and deserve all your good qualities, and will let you know that in no uncertain terms.

  8. Value yourself, your personality, your feelings, your talents, your body. Do not throw them without restraint at every potential love interest. Remember that at the wooing stage, the more easily something is available, the less its perceived value is. By offering things to those who may not want it or seek it on their own, you are only devaluing those things. Don't spend a lot of time, energy and feelings in relationships which don't go anywhere either, or with people who you know will never be your long-term permanent lover-partner. In fact, don't spend any time or energy doing 'romantic' things with such people. Doing this also means de-valuing yourself. It is like throwing your highly valuable personal love into the trash can. You are wasting and throwing away something which actually belongs to your true love. Protect yourself, your time, your feelings, your energy. Keep them safe for the true love who will come into your life. Guard these things jealously for her.

  9. Protect your virginity for your true love. It is okay to have pre-marital monogamous sex with your lover-partner, the person with whom you have a true, full-fledged (meaning steady and long-term sharing of life), loving relationship. It is definitely not okay with anybody else. Casual sex might be okay in theory, it might be okay for others. But it is not okay for you. It is an unclean and unhealthy food which won't suit your system nor your long-term health. Worse, it is addictive food; it will weaken your soul, and will cause considerable pain and drain on your emotions like all addictions. Just don't do it, regardless of the opportunities and temptations. You will regret if you do it. You will wish that you could go back in time and re-live your life, without letting yourself get into casual sex. Protect yourself.

  10. Just as you have a responsibility to protect yourself, you also have a responsibility to protect other people whose paths will cross yours. Just as you might have weak moments in love and passion, they will too. Just as you will feel hurt and regret when things don't work out, they will too. Protect these nice people who come into your life, whose only mistake (if it can be called that) is to love you, admire you and care for you. Protect them from the hurt that you will cause them or they will cause to themselves. Be especially wary of hurting these nice people in the long-term, while you try to avoid short-term hurt. This is a trap you will fall into repeatedly because you want to be nice to these nice people. Nice is okay. But, be totally honest, open and truthful with them, even if hurts them (and you) in the short term. They will be protected in the long-term. They will admire you for your courage and integrity, if you do that.

  11. This needs repeating again: You don't need to do anything to find true love. Just be yourself. Be nice, be clean and truthful, be sincere, be healthy, and above all, be happy and patient. Take all that time and energy you will put into romance and love, and put it into your career, education, hobbies and other interests, into social activities, into smiling. True love will find its way to you on its own. You don't need to do anything else.

  12. After that typical Libran Lover brand long lecture about love and romance, let's turn to your career. You will get into a software job. That means, you will have opportunities to go abroad. That means, you need a passport. For god's sake go get it done AT ONCE. Don't be the fool who runs from once government office to another, dragging your father and uncle with you, when opportunity comes knocking and you need a passport in a hurry. Just get it done IMMEDIATELY.

  13. The very first time you come to the US, you will want to stay here long-term. Only you won't define what long-term is. You will have some vague notion in your head of long-term being "at least two years or more". Well, guess what, you are going to end up staying here for well over six years. Incredibly, you will spend almost 5 of those years, without actually taking any concrete steps to build the right foundation for a career and for visa/greencard processing, which will both help you stay here for the long term! You will just spend those 5 years with your head buried in the sand of a dead-end job. It will be FIVE long years of no pay increments, while the company's stupid policies will bring in new, junior people who will work under you for higher pay, and the prospect of your work visa expiring at the end of 6 years, which will finally get your ass moving. Do yourself a favor, and start doing something at least at the end of your second year in the US.

  14. It won't help your career to be a jack of all trades, and master of none. You will spend much of your career in roles which will give you good exposure to a lot of different things, but just not enough mastery or authority on any one thing. It is an undeniable reality in life that great performers even if it is in lesser jobs get more recognition and satisfaction, than average performers in bigger jobs. The best way to grow in a career is to consistently be a great performer, going from smaller to bigger roles.

  15. If you want something in your career, just go get it. This is the exact opposite of the love advice, where you just have to be yourself and love will come to you. In the realm of the career, waiting for things to come to you, or for the company or your boss to give you what you want, will never work. You just have to get it yourself... even if it means quitting the job and getting a different one. Just be clear about what it is exactly that you want, then go get it.

  16. Never spend more than 1 hour at work, browsing the Internet for news and technological developments. Make every one of the other 7 hours count for productive work or directly work-related knowledge gain.

  17. Don't buy that house in early 2006. Wait until late 2007, when the real estate market in the US is even more in the doldrums, and it becomes a buyer's market with a lot more inventory waiting to be sold. And, don't buy the house until you can make 20% down payment. 10% is just not good enough.

  18. Get all the features you want the house to have, right when you buy it. Don't let others talk you into thinking that you can add extra features (like tiled floor rather than the carpet) later on. The "later on" might never come.

  19. Buy real tangible gifts for your parents and other family members. Avoid giving them money to buy what they want. They usually won't buy anything. One fine day, you will realize that you have been working for 10 years and not bought a single real gift to your parents, despite sending money for birthdays and such!

  20. Don't stop hiking when your regular hiking partners stop. You will find that a year or more has passed by without you hiking a single time, and you are out of shape! Shameful. Get out and hike by yourself, or find new hiking friends and groups. There are plenty out there.

  21. Smile more. Don't be lost in your own world when people are around you. Take more interest in them, socialize more.

Singapore Sling

I had four of this drink called Singapore Sling, on the Singapore Airlines flights from Los Angeles to India, this past weekend! I remember tasting it once before on a Singapore Airlines flight, but this time it really got to me. It is sweet, fruity, with not too strong alcoholic content.

Here's what the in-flight menu said about the yummy Singapore Sling:
Created in 1915 at the Long Bar of Singapore's Raffles Hotel. A concoction of dry gin, Dom Benedictine Cointreau and cherry brandy, shaken up with lime and pineapple juice, with a dash of Angostura bitters and Grenadine.

Webtender.com returns several recipes for the Singapore Sling search. But apparently, the above description is the Genuine Singapore Sling.

Apparently, this drink is popular with the other passengers as well. They had it pre-mixed in a pitcher on the food carts!

Monday, September 17, 2007

Kisi Nazar Ko Tera - The Audio

Kisi Nazar Ko Tera (mp3)

This is my own rendering of the melodious song from the movie Aitbar, originally sung by Bhupinder and Asha Bhonsle.

Lyrics here.

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Warnings for New Vegetarians in America

When vegetarian Indians come to the US, at first, most of them do not venture out to try the non-Indian food which is available in abundant variety here. The predominance of meat and meat-based items in menus everywhere does not encourage us to get adventurous. In fact, even many non-vegetarian Indians live in the US for a long time (years in some cases!) without sampling most of the non-Indian cuisines.

The first two times I came to the US were for 3-month visits during which, I lived with Indian roommates and we cooked at home. The few times I ate outside during these visits, I had vegetarian food from only Indian restaurants. Except may be, "burger with no meat" from McD's on a couple of occasions.

My third visit to the US was long term (I've still not returned almost 6 years later!). This time, I started to live alone. The combination of lethargy and lack of enthusiasm to cook alone, just for myself, caused me to eat out a lot more often. For the first 6 - 7 months of my third visit, I tried almost exclusively non-Indian food whenever I ate outside, which was pretty much everyday for lunch! This, despite my being a pure vegetarian - during those days, I even avoided stuff like pastries and cookies, which have eggs in them!

The point of this long-winded introduction is that, yes, it is definitely possible for vegetarians in the US to find a variety of eating choices, outside the home. Certainly not as many choices as non-vegetarians (especially those who don't mind eating pigs and cows) have, but the choices are still there. You just need to know what to look for, where and how to order. Nevertheless, during my 6 years of vegetarian life in the US, despite being very careful, there have been occasions when I have discovered that there were animal pieces/products in the food I was eating or had already eaten. It is hard to describe the awful feeling of personal violation I felt during those times.

The following is not only a rant about those occasions when I learnt that the 'vegetarian' food I ate contained animal products, I hope this will also serve as a warning for other vegetarians to know what to avoid or be careful about.
  • Contradictory Disclaimer: If you want to strictly avoid accidental ingestion of animal products while living in the US, the only solution is to make all your food at home, preferably from scratch and read very, very carefully, all the ingredients which go into making the few packaged food stuff you might buy. Or, if you cannot avoid eating outside, eat only raw fruits and vegetables, preferably cut with your own knife, without any type of dressing. Or, you might get lucky and find a vegan restaurant with highly enlightened and principled people running it. This might sound like a contradiction of what I wrote above about having vegetarian choices to eat outside in the US, but this is also the reality.


  • Non-vegetarian by accident: If you go to any restaurant which serves meat or meat-based food, accidental introduction of meat particles into your order might happen at some time or the other. This is true of Indian restaurants also. I have come across pieces of meat in what was supposed to be "vegetarian biriyani" at an Indian restaurant. On another occasion, I found a small piece of meat in the refried beans that filled my Taco Bell "chalupa with no meat".


  • Non-vegetarian by association: Even if the actual piece of meat does not end up in your order, the cutlery, utensils and hands would have handled meat before handling your vegetarian food. For example, in Subway, they use the same knife to cut every sandwich that needs to be cut. I mentioned Subway as just a random example. This point applies to most other restaurants.


  • Vegetarian by customizing: There are restaurants where you can take a meat-based dish from their menu, and order it customized for you, "with no meat". In Taco Bell, for example, you can order almost any dish on their menu and ask them to leave out the meat. Recently, I visited a Thai restaurant which had a note at the bottom of the menu saying that they could make any dish on their menu vegetarian. When you customize this way, be sure to order clearly and assertively, ensuring the person taking your order understands your requirement. And, when your order is delivered, be sure to double-check yourself that there is no meat before you start eating. Mistakes on customized orders are too easy to make. I once ordered a combo-meal of chalupas and tacos at Taco Bell, repeating at least two times that I want 'no meat' in my order. When my order arrived, I found that my chalupas indeed had no meat, but the tacos were filled with beef. Fortunately, I noticed this just as the Taco was about to enter my mouth. Incidentally, for some reason, most people taking orders in the US seem to hear and understand "with NO meat" more readily and easily than "without meat". I still don't know why!


  • Vegetarian / non-vegetarian by definition: In India, especially in South India, the word vegetarian has only one interpretation - no meat or eggs. Unfortunately, this is not so in the US. Different people interpret the words "vegetarian" and "with no meat" differently. The person taking your order or answering your questions at a restaurant is no different. Rather than assume that the other person's interpretation of the word vegetarian is the same as your own, you are better off clarifying exactly what you are looking for. Eg: "Would you be able to make this dish for me without meat and eggs? What do you recommend on your menu that has no animal products at all in it?"


  • "Vegetarian" (or not!) by subtraction: The other thing to remember is that some people are truly naive or unaware about why you are ordering something "with no meat". They might think that simply removing pieces of meat from a dish which was originally cooked with meat, or the vegetable soup made with beef broth without actually adding pieces of meat into it, will both satisfy your 'with no meat' criteria. I heard about the removing pieces of meat from a non-vegetarian dish incident from someone. The vegetable soup with beef broth thing actually happened to me!


  • Non-vegetarian by deception: This is by far the thing you need to be most careful about. When I say deception, I mean that vegetarians get deceived into eating meat products because it is so inconspicuous and not easily noticeable. I certainly don't mean that somebody is deliberately trying to deceive vegetarians into eating meat products. There is no way for me to list everything which appears to be a vegetarian dish, but is actually not. So, I will just list the stuff I come across most often, and will keep this list updated if I come across anything else later. If my readers would like for me to add/correct something in this list, please leave a comment.
    • Cheese - most of the cheeses are made with animal-based rennet enzymes.
    • Tortilla chips - in some (not all) Mexican restaurants, these are be fried in beef lard. Best to check before you eat.
    • Spanish rice & refried beans - another common item in Mexican restaurants. They are almost always cooked in chicken/beef broth. There may be exceptions. I have heard that black beans are not usually cooked in any animal broth. In any case, it's best to check before eating.
    • Fish oil in Thai restaurants - I have heard that Thais use fish oil in most of their dishes, just like Indians put hoggarenne or thadka in many of their dishes. Yes, they could use fish oil in even vegetarian dishes such as vegetable Pad Thai or fried rice, as well as vegetarian soups and curries. Best to clarify.
    • Grilled / Fried vegetarian stuff like veggie burgers or fries - if you are ordering these in a restaurant that also serves meat, you can pretty much take it for granted that your order will get grilled / fried on the same hot plate, skillet or utensil, and probably in the same oil, in which some other meat-based dish was cooked. Your order will come smeared with animal fat and particles.
    • Meat with strange names - the English language has too many strange and unfamiliar names for different types of meats, and one might get deceived by that. It is almost as if they don't want people to know or remember exactly which animal they are eating. I have heard of Indian vegetarians eating pepperoni pizza without knowing that pepperoni is a type of pig meat. It has the word pepper in it, for god's sake!
    • Sauces and salad dressings - there are too many sauces and salad dressings which might contain animal-products in them. A lot of salad dressings have eggs in them. Original Caesar salad dressing is supposed to have anchovies (a type of fish). Worcestershire sauce, which I allowed someone to add to my food once, has anchovies too. You can be pretty sure that tomato, soy and most chilli sauces don't contain any animal products. Most Italian salad dressings and vinegar-based dressings are also probably safe. Everything else should be questioned and consumed only if you are absolutely sure.

  • Egg on your face: Eggs! These compete neck-and-neck with the stuff in the list above, for things you have to be most careful about... that is, if you are a vegetarian who does not eat eggs. It is amazing the number of food items in which the egg turn up. This is one thing which has defeated me in America! When I was new in the US, I avoided eating cakes and cookies, and thought I was safe from eggs. Turns out that eggs were present in so many other things which I was already eating - pastas, ice-creams, certain types of breads, pancakes, waffles, even salad dressing, for god's sake. There I was, stuffing my face with salads, trying different types of salad dressings and thinking I was safe, unaware that many salad dressings were leaving egg on my face. Yes, a lot of salad dressings have egg in them. If you want salad dressings with no egg - Italian dressing and many of the vinegar-based dressings are safe in most places. Also, when you order vegetarian fried rice or vegetarian Pad Thai or most other vegetarian dishes in Chinese and Thai restaurants, be sure to say 'no eggs'. A large number of people consider eggs to be vegetarian! Once I saw something called "egg substitute" in a breakfast restaurant's menu. Great! It looked like something that would be used in place of eggs. I asked the waitress what it was made of - she could not answer me properly. She was already too hassled at that busy hour and I did not want to take up too much of her time. I thought egg substitutes may be made with soy, considering that soy is used as a substitute for so many animal-based food products. Only days later, after I had relished my order made with "egg substitute", did I learn that the main ingredient in most egg substitutes is... ta-da... EGG! Yes, yesss - egg substitutes are made with eggs. Egg substitute is this powder which (mixed with water) is used in place of real eggs to lower the fat and cholesterol levels. But most egg substitutes have egg-whites in them! I have managed to avoid meat in the US, but it is really tough to avoid egg, simply because it is used in making so many things. After having consumed eggs without being aware in so many different items, I accepted defeat. Now, I eat things like cakes, cookies, etc. which might contain eggs in them in disguised, invisible form. But I still don't eat eggs in direct, visible form - boiled, scrambled or in any other way.


Whew! That post turned out longer than I expected. I will stop here. I hope this list is of use to new vegetarians in the US. But before I close, I do want to reiterate that all hope is not lost - there are still lots of safe choices for vegetarians in the US. Just browse through the posts labelled "Food" on this blog, and you will see a small sampling of a variety of vegetarian choices, in my "Vegetarian Lunch in America" series.

Friday, September 14, 2007

Voting is Compulsory in Australia!

Today I learnt from the Google Public Policy blog post on Australian elections that voting is compulsory in Australia for all eligible citizens!

To use a popular teenage phrase: I was like, WHOA!

And then, I wondered what happens if someone does not vote in Australia. A quick Google search brought up this helpful FAQ page from the Australian Electoral Commission. Apparently, they get fined in Australia if they don't vote:
What happens if I do not vote?
Initially the Australian Electoral Commission will write to all apparent non-voters requesting that they either provide a reason for their failure to vote or pay a $20 penalty.

If, within 21 days, the apparent non-voter fails to reply, cannot provide a valid and sufficient reason or declines to pay the penalty, then prosecution proceedings may be instigated. If the matter is dealt with in court and the person is found guilty, he or she may be fined up to $50 plus court costs.

Wow! They should make voting compulsory in all democratic countries. I don't know what effect it would have ultimately, but it will definitely make those shady politicians work harder... at least on the campaign trail, in order to win over a larger number of more diverse citizens.

The voter turn-out right now is pathetic in most elections - both in the US and in India. (I am not familiar with the voter turn-out in other countries.) Even in the US Presidential elections, which garner great interest world-wide, the voter turn-out is remarkably poor - just around 50%. Check this link which lists the voter turn-out in every Federal election since 1960. The bold numbers occuring every 4 years correspond to the Presidential elections and they consistenly show around 50% voter turn-out!

Yes, that 50% is the total voter turn out - includes people who voted for both/all the contesting candidates and people whose votes were invalid for one reason or the other. What this means is that every President Of The United States is actually sent to the office by a small minority of people, compared to the total population of the country! So, a presidential candidate does not need to win over the majority of the citizens - he just has to concentrate on winning over just enough of the minority to beat his/her rival candidates! Is it any surprise that most Presidents don't really seem to work for the people? Is it any wonder that the American Democracy no longer seems to be of the people, for the people, by the people?

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Fuck You, sellers of love!

To everyone who sold to me the ideas about love and romance - Fuck You very much! To every romantic book, movie, song and story I've come across - Fuck You very much!

The one thing that has caused me the greatest pain, hurt, tears, humiliation, damage, loss, grief, frustration is love.

To love itself - Fuck You very very much!

Sunday, September 09, 2007

Non-evolution of Humans

Our external world is fast changing. Incredible changes happen in the world from year to year, decade to decade, century to century. Some of these changes are unimaginable for most people until they actually happen. These external changes, which are considered to be 'progress' and 'evolution', lull most of us humans into thinking that we are actually progressing or evolving as a species. That is a total illusion!

We may be evolving better or faster or easier ways of doing things - eating, sleeping, mating, travelling, entertaining ourselves, killing others. But, we are not evolving much at a personal level, as people, as a species.

When we read literary works that are a few years or decades old, a few centuries old (Shakespeare, for example) or even thousands of years old (ancient epics like the Mahabharatha or the Greek myths), we note that the human concerns and character, our desires and feelings, our actions and reactions have not changed much at all. In thousands of years, we have really not evolved much in terms of how our personalities are.

Our lack of evolution is amazing. And, when we consider that we are still fighting, hurting and killing one another, still starving for proper food in large pockets of the world, it is disappointing. And worst of all, when we see at a personal level that, we have still not mastered effective communication and sharing of love, control of anger and jealousy, avoiding hurting those who love us, sharing food and riches, successfully experiencing a content and nurturing romantic relationship, the non-evolution of humans is downright depressing.

If we measure inter-personal and intra-personal (i.e., in the mind of a single person) conflict and strife within all the species of the world, humans will probably be toppers. By that measure, we are probably one of the least evolved species - in terms of communication, personality, inter-personal relationship!

Candidates@Google: Ron Paul

Ron Paul is a Republican candidate hoping to be the next President of the United States. He calls himself a constitutionalist first. I have seen a few Internet videos of him speaking and I am pleasantly surprised. Among all the politicians - both American and Indian - I have seen so far, Ron Paul comes across as the one with the most sincere convictions and ideals. You will get no lame, empty sound-bytes or insincere, populist rhetoric from this guy. He is extremely articulate, and everything he says seem to be based on deeply held convictions and logical reasoning. Not only that, he has consistently stuck to his ideals in his entire political career - no contradictions, no compromises seem to appear in his political record.

No wonder that Ron Paul's popularlity is increasing phenomenally among younger Americans with diverse leanings - Democrat or Republican, conservative or liberal. I don't agree with all his positions, but boy, is it refreshing to see a politician like Ron Paul in these times!

Seriously, if you care about who the next President of the United States will be, you should Google Ron Paul. Even if you don't care, just check out the video below of his interview at Google, to see why he is so different and important to present day America.

How to be the Perfect Girlfriend

Saturday, September 08, 2007

Why non-Indian women prefer to marry than just date Indian men?

In the comments to my post on Indian men and Inter-racial dating, a reader calling himself hopefloats, wrote this in his comment:
3. dating->marriage - In many posts non-indian women quote "oh..indian men are not into marrying non-indian women..so we dont date them".
Even if we assume this is true..I dont understand why this is a big deal for non-indian women in US/Canada.Most of them anyways have multiple relationships/marriages before they settle down with their final partner. Here are the possible reasons
a) either it's a politicall correct cover for the ethnic/racial non-preference.
b) or, only for marriage, they want indian men..not for dating/having-fun.

Both Indian and non-Indian women quite frequently have this complaint about Indian men - that they date and 'have fun' with women from different nationalities and ethnicities, but when it comes to marriage, they prefer Indian women. It is as if Indian men are held to a standard where they are supposed to date only those women whom they might marry.

The reality is that most people in the world have a double-standard about whom they will date casually versus whom they will choose for a serious relationship like marriage. Men and women who date and have flings, may do so with a variety people. But for marriage, they will have specific preferences and expectations in the potential partner. So, they won't just marry anybody whom they might date. If casual dating is your thing, there is nothing wrong in having such differing preferences - it is practical and pragmatic.

I think that we hear complaints about this 'double-standard' quite often about Indian men from non-Indian women for two reasons. These reasons are somewhat different from those listed in hopefloat's comment above (I'm not saying I agree or disagree with his comment). The reasons I have in mind are:

1. Those who are affected are the ones who'll speak up more. The non-Indian women who genuinely fell for the Indian men and/or who were hoping to have a serious relationship with Indian men, are the ones most affected by Indian men preferring Indian women for marriage. So, obviously, they are the ones we hear from more. The women who are only dating Indian men casually are not too bothered by this, because hey, they are only in it for the fun. So, we don't hear anything positive or negative from them.

2. I suspect that there are not too many non-Indian women dating Indian men casually, just for fun. I don't have scientific data or statistics to backup my claim. However, it is common experience that most young people are not usually into experimenting with foreign stuff - even in matters such as food and entertainment. Young people usually prefer stuff they have grown up around, are familiar with. We are not done fully experiencing and experimenting with familiar stuff until we are almost into our 30's. Only after that, we start to look at what else is out there. So, by the time non-Indian women start to look at what else is out there and discover that interesting Indian man, they are past the phase of casual fun and are at an age when they want something more serious out of relationships.

There are no doubt exceptions to what I have stated above, but it is true for the most part. Reading the comments on this blog under posts such as Indian men and Inter-racial dating and Dating Indian Men II does show that most non-Indian women who are interested in Indian men are at a later stage in life when they are more interested in settling down in a serious relationship or marriage, than in just dating and having flings.

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

A Simple Story of Intimacy….

Read this story on one of my reader's blogs, and had to share it with the rest of you guys.

You may read it here: A Simple Story of Intimacy…

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Or, you may read the story below.

"When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several
Weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that everyday for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife’s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office… jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind… I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote,

I’ll carry you out every morning until death does us apart."

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Love vs Justice & Pride

Zen Denizen asked the following question in the comments to my post Enough Love:

Do you believe love is stronger than justice and pride?

At first, I thought that she was asking if one has to choose between love versus justice and pride, what should be chosen. Re-reading the question and understanding it in simpler terms, she might simply be asking if love is more resilient than justice and pride. Whatever she meant to ask, I thought the answer to both questions would be interesting. So, here goes.


What is stronger? Love? Or, justice and pride?

I will answer the simpler question first: It doesn't take much to break justice and pride. One lie, one dishonest act can kill justice. One failure, one humiliation, one moment of humbleness can break pride. But true love is not so easy to break or kill. Love can go through many tests, trials and tribulations, many rejections and failures, and still survive. In that sense, love is much stronger than justice and pride.


Love vs Justice

Being in a position where you have to choose between love and justice is especially tough. The classic example is that of a law enforcement officer who catches his much-loved child in a criminal act. Should the officer succumb to love and let his child off the hook? Or should he treat the child as he would treat any other unknown criminal?

Given that justice is so much more fragile - all it takes is one lie or one dishonest act to kill justice - than love, I'd say that justice should be chosen if there is ever a conflict between love and justice. There is another (more) important reason to preserve justice: true love cannot be built and sustained over a foundation of injustice and lies. Love needs a strong foundation of justice and truth. A love that is chosen at the cost of truth, is a weakened love. It won't survive for long.


Love vs Pride

Pride is like cholesterol - there is good pride and there is bad pride. Excessive pride, false pride or a pride based on the insecurity of a person, is a sure killer of love. Such pride can kill love like an especially vile parasite. Such pride saps the health out of a good relationship.

On the other hand, complete lack of pride results in a weak individual and an unhealthy relationship. Love cannot be sustained by a weak individual, in an unhealthy relationship. Healthy pride is a symptom of self-confidence and a sense of self-worth. It is the mark of a well-balanced and secure individual. The kind of individual who can provide and share a secure, nourishing, nurturing love.


Summary

It can be very difficult and trying when we find ourselves in a position where we have to choose between love and justice / pride. In such a stressful situation, it is all too easy to make a short-sighted choice which appears to be in favor of love. However, a wise choice, is the one which will sustain both love and justice / pride, in the long run. Beware of a choice which requires you to sacrifice one thing or the other. I hope the above answers help us all make wise choices.

Thursday, August 02, 2007

Monsoon Rainbow

Monsoon Rainbow(Click for bigger pic!)

This gorgeous rainbow appeared over our neighborhood last evening, after a monsoon shower!

Sunday, July 15, 2007

Enough Love

There is no difficulty that enough love will not conquer, no disease that enough love will not heal, no door that enough love will not bridge, no wall that enough love will not throw down, no sin that enough love will not redeem... It makes no difference how deeply seated may be the trouble, how hopeless the outlook, how muddled the tangle, how great the mistake. A sufficient realization of love will dissolve it all. If only you could love enough, you could be the happiest and most powerful being in the world...

- Emmet Fox

Saturday, July 14, 2007

Most irritating about Microsoft Windows

I know what irritates me most about Microsoft Windows operating system: the way the focus can jump from one window to another without warning or control. There are no doubt bigger holes and issues in Microsoft Windows, but this one issue of uncontrolled focus-jumping irritates me several times every day.

Suppose you start a particular task or process in Window A - say, opening a particular folder or saving a document - and while this task is being performed, you navigate to another window B to do some other task there. The way the Windows operating system often behaves is that when the task or process in window A is completed, it automatically brings window A into focus, no matter what you are doing in window B. All of a sudden, you will find window A popping up in your face, replacing window B.

I hate this behavior. I work very fast at the computer. So, if some task takes too much time (more than 15-20 seconds, may be) in one window and it is not a really high priority task, I usually send the window to the background and switch to another task in another window. When I send a window to the background, I want it to stay in the background until I consciously navigate to it.

Instead, after a few moments, it will pop up into the foreground without warning. Due to this behavior, at times I end up typing stuff into the first window, that I intended to type in the second window. Sometimes I end up doing more damaging activities than merely typing - such as, saving or discarding changes when I did not intend to.

Anybody else hate this behavior of Windows?

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Big Screen Productivity

I am switching to a new laptop at work. During this transition period, I have access to both machines - which means, two screens on my desk. I have been working this way for the past couple of days, and I love it.

A surprisingly big portion of working on a computer involves comparing, correlating or transferring information from one application or window to another. I like to have most of my windows maximized to full screen. So, I spend a lot of time switching back and forth between windows. Having two screens side by side made many of my tasks so much more convenient.

So, I am sold on the productivity of using big screens now. I wish I could have a monitor big enough to hold two or three 1024 X 768 sized windows side by side. That would rock!

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Mom's Care No More

Last night, in a moment of intense anguish, I called out to my mother. I have not done that in such a long time - called out to her, that is. I don't even remember when was the last time I called out to her.

Anyway, my mother is in India. So, she could not hear my call. Nevertheless, a few minutes later, she called me on the phone. Only to tell me that she is getting admitted to a hospital today for a surgery. I am very concerned and worried for her health.

This is a milestone in my life. This is when I realize that I can no longer fall back on my mother's care. And that, it is now my turn to take care of my parents.

Oh, I am sure my parents care for me a lot. They are very concerned about me, and I am sure they would want to comfort and support me in my times of need. But my problems and concerns will only trouble them more.

I have always been an independent child. In fact, I have actively tried not to involve my parents too much in my personal challenges and difficulties. I have never really been able to fully express my pain and worries to them, for fear of getting them more worried. This is truer now than ever before.

Although I never really wanted to rely on them, there was some comfort in knowing that they are there, in case I needed to rely on someone. But now, this realization that I should take care of them rather than relying on them, makes me feel especially lonely.

Thursday, July 05, 2007

VoIP - 1

Background
Last Thursday, I gave a speech at the Toastmaster's meeting on VoIP. The speech project was to research a topic and then talk about it.

It was supposed to be a 5-7 min speech. I planned on taking 1-2 minutes to give a brief explanation of what VoIP means. The rest of the time was to be spent introducing the audience to 3 or 4 VoIP services which are available in the market right now, to demonstrate how VoIP makes a difference in our lives. The audience was perfect for this topic - not one of them had a VoIP phone line in their homes. I thought that at the end of my speech, they would all be really inpsired to check out VoIP and benefit from it. Boy, was my speech a disaster!

As it turned out, the explanation of the theory behind VoIP took up most of my time. When you are giving a speech, time can fly real fast. I did not have much time at all to talk about the VoIP products/services I was going to show the audience. Even if I had the time, it would not have turned out all that great because my laptop would not connect to the projector. I was going to show them the features of the VoIP services on the screen for maximum effect. As it turned out, I learnt during the feedback that people did not even know that VoIP was related to their telephone service or usage.
They thought I was giving a speech on a theoretical technology that was way out there and did not affect their daily lives in any way! Repeat: what a disaster!

But I can see opportunity in this disaster. Two opportunities in fact. One opportunity is my next speech whose objective is to 'persuade with power'. I think I can show the audience these great VoIP products/services and persuade them to check them out, and perhaps, even use them. The other opportunity is, of course, to write this blog post as a way to gather my speech material.

VoIP Technology
VoIP stands for Voice over Internet Protocol. To put it in very simplistic terms, VoIP is the technology which is used to transport voice over the Internet. In VoIP, a person's voice signals are converted into digital packets, which are then sent over the Internet to the destination. At a very high level, it is not much different from sending textual data, such as emails. What this means is that, like most Internet traffic, there is no synchronous connection between the sender and receiver of voice data. The modern Internet channels are so fast and efficient that despite this asynchronous transfer of voice data, the data packets still manage to be gathered and re-assembled quickly enough at the receivers end, so that the receiver gets a signal which makes sense and is of great quality. In fact, the best quality voice conversations I have had between the US and India has consistently been over VoIP connections, and not the traditional phone lines.

The traditional telephone systems are called circuit-switched systems. In simplistic terms, in the traditional system, a synchronous, continuous circuit/connection is established between the sender and receiver of the voice signals. In the olden days, this continuous connection was made of copper wires. These days, we have all kinds of cables from copper to fibre optic cables, and traditional telephone signals are even sent over satellite.

The difference between traditional circuit-switched telephone systems and VoIP can be understood at a high-level through the analogy of the railways and roadways. Rail transportation requires that there be a continuous railway line between the point of origin and the destination. There is not much flexibility in the route. Even the containers used for transportation (the boxcars of the train) have rigidly defined size, shape standards. If there is a problem along the railway line, it can hold up traffic for a long time. The amount of railway lines and the places where they are available is quite limited. Compared to that the roadways are so much more flexible. There are many combinations of streets you can take from origin to destination. If there are accidents or problems along one route, you can take a different route. The size and types of vehicles you can use to transport goods over roadways are too numerous to list. The road network is extensive and almost unlimited to most places where people live.

The fact that voice signals are converted to digital data packets in VoIP is important. What that means is that the data packets can now be processed and manipulated by computers and newer digital phones, in ways that were never possible with the older phones.

It is also signifant that the voice data is transported over the Internet, instead of over regular telephone lines. What this implies is that the provider of the VoIP telephone service need not overly concern themselves about the route the voice signal takes from the sender to the receiver. They don't have to spend lot of time, effort and money in leasing bandwidth on telephone lines from the point of origin to the destination. They don't have to be concerned about providing a connecting line to each of their telephone subscribers. All that the telephone subscribers need to have is a high-speed Internet connection. All that the VoIP service providers need is a big enough connection to the Internet to send and receives voice data from all their customers. Of course, the VoIP service provider also needs to be connected to the traditional phone network to be able to provide connections between their VoIP customers and the users of regular phone lines. But this is a relatively smaller concern, compared to being concerned about the their entire network from the point of origin to the destination.

The two factors - manipulating voice data packets with computers and the telephone service providers not having to concern themselves too much about the entire telephone network - result in some great advantages and features to us, the regular telephone users. Those features, along with examples of VoIP products and services which offer them, will be presented in my next post on VoIP. Look out for that post to start taking advantage of these features yourself.

Sunday, July 01, 2007

Lessons in Mistakes for Alpha Males

Making Mistakes
  • Everybody in the tribe makes mistakes. The Alpha Male might make a big mistake. He has big responsibilities, big authority, big power. So, it is natural for him to be in a position where he might make big mistakes.


  • The biggest mistake the Alpha Male can make is to think that he is a worse person because he made a big mistake. How big a mistake a person makes is not necessarily proportional to how bad a person he is. The Alpha Male must always remember that he made a big mistake because he is a big person with big responsibilities.

Admitting Mistakes
  • The Alpha Male must be brutally honest with himself in admitting his mistakes and the causes for the mistake. Admitting his mistakes to others is a different matter.


  • The Alpha Male must admit mistakes to others only if such admission is necessary for rectifying the mistake or for healing the hurts caused by his mistake or for teaching a lesson to others so that they don't make the same mistake. Otherwise, the Alpha Male should not admit mistakes to others.


  • The tribe does not follow the Alpha Male because he makes mistakes and admits to them. The tribe follows the Alpha Male because he corrects mistakes and takes the tribe forward.


  • While admitting the mistake might appear honest and honorable, most tribe members will see it merely as a weakness. It takes some maturity to recognize honor in the admission of mistakes, and most followers don't have that maturity.

Rectifying after Mistakes
  • The first step to rectifying a mistake is for the Alpha Male to remember that he is the Alpha Male. He is the Do-er of Things. He is the Fixer. He is not a smaller person or a bad person just because he made the big mistake.


  • Alpha Males can be hard on themselves, expecting to always do the best. So, when they make a mistake, they might spend time and energy brooding on it, beating themselves up. This is not productive. The Alpha Male should give only as much thought and energy to mistakes, as it is necessary to learn the causes and contributing factors of the mistakes, and learn what it takes to rectify the mistake.


  • The Alpha Male should not allow himself to be defeated just because he made a mistake. The mistake might prove that he is not the smartest or the strongest, but he is still the Alpha Male. He should not give up his power and authority to others just because he made a mistake.


  • If the Alpha Male is indeed broken or defeated by a mistake, and he is not able to correct it or lead the tribe, he should step down and let someone more capable take over. There is nothing more pathetic or dangerous than a person who is no longer the Alpha Male, but who is pretending to be one or trying to futilely to hold on to the title.


  • By all means let the Alpha Male listen to other wise members of the tribe for advice on correcting the mistake. But what he does with such advice is his own decision and responsibility. He should execute the rectifications with his own power, as his own actions. He should be careful not to give up his power and authority to those who advice him in the time of his defeat or mistake.


  • This is worth repeating: Mistakes and defeats do not make or break the Alpha Male. The Alpha Male is made or broken by what is in his heart, his head and in his balls.

Mistakes and Women
  • One of the worst mistakes the Alpha Male can make is one involving a woman - doing something wrong to her or doing something wrong with her or doing something wrong because of her. The Alpha Male should take special precautions not to mix up mistakes and women.


  • Most women follow the Alpha Male for the same reason the rest of the tribe does: because he is the Alpha Male, because he is the Do-er, the Fixer, the Leader. They admire and love him for the same reasons. Not because he makes mistakes or admits to them.


  • The Alpha Male might feel the need to have some person with whom he can let down his guard, freely admit his weaknesses and mistakes, be vulnerable. He must be careful about whom he chooses to do these with. Doing all these with a woman does not necessarily make him the cute love-able puppy to her.


  • The Alpha Male is better off having an older trustworthy mentor for letting down his guard, admitting his weakness and mistakes, and being vulnerable. Ideally, such a mentor is not a direct follower of the Alpha Male and is somewhat removed from the rest of the tribe.


  • There is a rare woman who can see every weakness of the Alpha Male, still recognize that he is the Alpha Male, support and help him to overcome those weaknesses, and love and respect him at the end of it all. The Alpha Male who has such a woman in his life is very lucky. Such a woman will be one of the main strengths which make him the Alpha Male.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Ideal Programming Comments

Leaving proper and abundant comments in code has always been one of the most repeated programming tips.

We were discussing the inadequate commenting practice among team members at work, when I had this to say:

Ideally, comments left in a program should be such that if you filter out/hide all the code and read only the comments, that should give you a good idea of the logic of the program.

Loneliest thing I have done

I am used to doing things alone. Most of the times. I don't usually have buddies interested in the same things as I am. So, for most of my life, I have been going to places or events alone, and then making friends there. I never really minded it. In fact, I liked making new varieties of friends, in new places.

I am now sitting in a clinic for my immigration medical exam (and blogging on my phone). There are couple of other Indian guys here. They both seem to be here with their wives. Both wives are good looking. As I sit here and listen to them having their idiosyncratic conversations that don't really mean anything, I realize that this immigration thing is the most lonely thing I have doing in my life.

I personally don't know anyone who is doing this alone. Most Indians are married by the time they reach this stage in their immigration process. They do it with their spouses.

I am not feeling lonely only because I am doing this alone. I'm feeling lonely more because I realize that this immigration thing has the potential to put some serious distance between the Love of My Life and myself. Each step, each form, each activity in this process is depressing and tortuous.

I had pretty much accepted that this step would come about 3-4 years from now. But the state department advanced the dates by a huge deal. Why did this have to come now, in the middle of everything else I'm dealing with??

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

The Reason

The Reason (mp3)

This is my own rendering of The Reason (lyrics), originally recorded by the band Hoobastank.

State of Tears

Just got off a painful 28-minute phone call with mom. She kept trying to persuade me to get married, to consider the girls she'd like to find for me.

I kept telling her, "Don't want."

She kept asking me, "Why don't want? What do you mean by, 'don't want'? What do you want? What do you have in mind? What are your intentions? If not now, when would you want?" So on, and so forth.

I kept telling her, "Don't want."

Then she said, "Don't say that you don't want now, and then find yourself in a state of tears later."

Poor mom. Doesn't know that her son is already in a state of tears.

Jhonka hawa ka

YESSS! Finally, I have come around to posting my songs - yes, sung and recorded by myself - on this blog! Thanks to the folks at MyPodcast.com for hosting my audio files.

This first song-post is dedicated to the Love of My Life.

Click below. Be warned, it's a link to an mp3 file.

Jhonka hawa ka

This song is originally from the movie, Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam.

Saturday, June 23, 2007

Libran Lover's Blog Updates 2

This year, Google has been introducing a whole lot of sharing options among all its services. I have used a couple of these to share some nice things with you on the side-bar:
  1. Through My Lens - In this section on the side-bar, I use Picasa Web Albums to run a small slide-show of some favorite photos, I have clicked myself. You can mouse-over the slide-show to activate the slide-show controls and toggle the caption display. Click on a photo to view it in bigger size, and leave comments if you'd like. Keep checking for new photos from my travels and adventures.
  2. My Shared Reading - In this section, I share some of the interesting and share-worthy items I have read recently on my Goodle Reader subscriptions. You can click on the links to read each article in full, on its original website. This section will be automatically updated with fresh links every time I find something worth sharing. So, keep an eye here too for new items.

If you read my blog through RSS readers, you will not be able to see these side-bar sections. You will have to visit my blog page.

I hope all you readers like these new sections. Let me know if the position of these sections on the side-bar should be moved around.

Friday, June 22, 2007

Getting Back into the Dating Scene

Before you misunderstand, no, I am not back in the dating scene. Sorry to disappoint ladies! ;-)

A nice lady who has been out of the dating scene for almost 10 years asked my advice on how she can get back into it. Here's my advice to her:
The best thing you can do right now is forget about dating, and concentrate on all the things which you are truly interested in, things you feel passionate about, things which bring you happiness, things that are not men. I feel that the best way to attract good people to ourselves is by being happy. When we are happy, people will come to us naturally. Some of those people will suck our happiness, some will share, some will increase our happiness. When you meet the person who increases your happiness, you know that you have found the person you want to date.

I am not really a believer in the 'dating techniques', rules, personal ads, being setup with someone, etc. I think that these are all market place techniques. I am not a market player. I am a Lover. And this is what I can tell you as a Lover.

I hope this helps.

Garden State - Movie Review

Last weekend, I had the pleasure of watching the excellent movie, Garden State.

Zach Braff has written and directed, as well as starred in the lead role. Zach is more popularly known as the funny lead character in one of my favorite television comedies, Scrubs. Garden State is a much appreciated movie, causing lot of people to eagerly anticipate Zach's next movie, which is not out yet.

Garden State is the story of a depressed, struggling 26-year-old actor from Los Angeles, going back home and finding his real home. It is a representation of the popular saying, "Home is where the heart is." Zach Braff plays the role of Andrew, a struggling and depressed actor in Los Angeles (his regular job seems to be that of a not-so-good waiter at a restaurant), who goes back home to a small town in New Jersey, to attend his mother's funeral. He has not been home for 9 years, and we learn that he has been in medication prescribed by his psychologist father since the age of 9 or so, when he accidentally caused his mother to be paralyzed from the waist-down. Back in his hometown, he goes off the medication and catches up with his highschool buddies, each of whom is quirky and funny. Along the way, he runs into sweet, cheerful and lying Samantha, played wonderfully by Natalie Portman. It is with her that Andrew discovers the precious feeling of truly coming home, finding peace, contentment, acceptance and love.

I have always liked movies which handle depressing plots/characters in comic ways. Garden State has become my favorite movie in that genre. It strikes a great balance between depression and comedy, without overdoing either one. Through most of the movie, you feel the lead character Andrew's quiet, desperate, depression, even as you laugh at all the other quirky characters (mostly his highschool friends), their silly lines and the funny scenes. Natalie Portman's portrayal of Samantha, who brings Andrew out of his depression and helps him discover love, by doing nothing more than being her naive, silly, cheerful self was utterly convincing.

There were some weird-interesting-funny scenes in the movie like the one where Andrew's shirt perfectly matches the bathroom walls, a family dog masturbates and there is a hall-way in a hotel from which perverts peep on hotel guests. Two of my favorite scenes from the movie:
  • There is the opening scene which shows the inside of a crashing plane, with everybody close to panic, but Andrew is totally calm while a mellifluous voice chants a Sanskrit prayer in the background.
  • Then there is the scene where Andrew, his highschool buddy Mark and Samantha stand at the edge of cliff which falls into a deep dark canyon and shout their hearts out. That scene is symbolic if Andrew's life at that point of time - his future is dark, deep and unknown, which could hold horrors or treasures, but the shout that comes of his heart while he stands at its edge is one of venting, relief and elation, all mixed together.

But its the final scene which ties it all together: having come to his old home, having discovered a new home for his heart, and standing at the edge of the unknown, will Andrew succumb to his doubts and fears and run away, or will he choose to stay, and nurture his new-found home and love? You will have to watch the movie to find out for yourself.


Official movie site: http://www.gardenstatemovie.com.

Google Vs eBay

Valleywag reports on eBay suspending its Adwords-based advertising through Google after a recent squabble between the two companies. Apparently, Google scheduled a Freedom Party to promote its own payment service Google Checkout, inviting eBay sellers for free drinks, food and massage. The fun part is that Google scheduled this event close - in time and space - to eBay's Live event for its top sellers in Boston. Google rubbed it in further by giving its "Freedom party" a Boston Tea Party spin. All this because eBay won't allow Google Checkout to be used as a payment option on its website. eBay, of course, wouldn't do that because Checkout is a direct competitor to eBay's own Paypal.

eBay's contributions to Google's coffers are big enough that Google suspended its planned party, when eBay stopped advertising via Google. But the damage is done. eBay continues to boycott Google, although the latter was/is the top traffic driver to the former.

While the party fiasco has been publicized a lot, Google and Ebay were bound to step on each other's feet (not just toes!) sooner or later. The fact is that, Google has its fingers in too many pies which Ebay considers its own right now. Examples include Paypal and Skype. Google also has the potential to bite out a large chunk of Ebay's pies, if it chooses to do so. Offering innovative services and features on GTalk and Google Checkout could give some serious competition to Skype and Paypal. And Google has all the big pieces needed to quickly build an Ebay competitor in the auction and sales space. Perhaps, Google should take this as an opportunity to kickstart the campaign of giving eBay a run for its money.

It will be interesting to see how this war plays out between the two. Even if the current battle ends tamely by eBay turning on some (not all!) of its Adwords advertising, the long term war is far from over.

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Lawyer's Turn

Finally it was my lawyer's turn today to advise me to get married!

For the past year or more, pretty much everybody I know has advised, requested, ordered or scolded me to get married. My wedding is the most common subject people bring up with me in conversations - whether it is in casual parties or office rest rooms. I am not exaggerating about the rest room part - I have lost count of the number of people who casually ask me when I am going to get married, when they run into me in the rest room, of all the places! WTH!

Today my immigration attorney advised me to get married as soon as possible. Here's the background: The latest visa bulletin from the US State Department states that the priority dates for all categories of employment-based immigration visas (read green cards) are 'Current'. Just last month, the priority date was four years ago! What this means is that the waiting period to get the green card has been reduced from about 5 years to about 1 year for people like me.

This is a huge leap forward. An important life-changing event for thousands of Indians who are in the green card queue in the US, freeing up their employment and travel potential. This is one of those extremely rare occurences in the history of US greencard processing for Indians. It is as rare as a particularly auspicious planetary alignment.

Everybody who is affected by this is overjoyed and scrambling to get their green card process jumped forward as quickly as possible. Everybody that is, except single Indians like me. I am one of the very few people this month, who must have asked their attorneys to not go forward with their green card process. You see, if my green card gets processed for me as a single person, it will be extremely hard for my future wife to join me in the US from India. It is always advisable for green card processing to be done along with the spouse (and kids, if any).

So my attorney's advice was for me to get married as soon as possible because they don't know when we'll have a chance like this again.

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Toughest in Love

Love is not always easy. As tough as love can get, there are two things which are the toughest in love.

1. Distance: This could mean being distant from the beloved geographically or emotionally. When you love someone, you want to be with them, close to them, sticking to them as much as you can. You want to be able to reach out to each other whenever you feel the need. You want to be able to see them. You want to be able to share with them, all the new or interesting or beautiful things you come across. You want to be so close as being two souls in one body, or one soul in two bodies. When we are distant from the beloved for whatever reasons, we feel like a body without a soul, like half a person. We don't live our life fully. Our thoughts and emotions, our heart and soul, are always away, in some other place, searching and reaching for the beloved. Geographical distance is quite tough. Tougher than that is when the beloved is right there in front of us or talking to us everyday, and yet emotionally far from us, not sharing the love with us.

2. Letting go: The other thing which is really tough in love is letting go. When we love, we have lots of desires, hopes, dreams. When the person we love does not share the same desires, hopes and dreams, we have to let go of ours. We can't force the other person to go against their heart. We can't talk them into it or persuade them. We just have to let go. Letting go of our own desires and dreams, to subjugate them to the desires and well-being of our beloved, letting go of the beloved, just simply letting go without getting anything in return is the greatest act of love. And it's also the toughest.

Sexuality of Vegetarian Food

We don't give this much thought, but almost all the vegetarian food we eat is quite frankly sexual in nature.

Most of the vegetarian food the humans eat is comprised of fruits and seeds of plants. And these are the sexual organs of plants, the parts from which they reproduce. Even when we eat roots of plants such as potatoes and carrots, we are eating the parts from which these types of plants reproduce.

In contrast, most non-vegetarian food is comprised of the non-reproductive parts of animals. Except for eggs.

Humans are quite unique in their almost exclusive preference for the sexual organs of plants as food. Most other herbivorous (vegetarian) animals eat other parts of the plants, apart from the fruits and seeds. I find this fascinating in a weird sort of way.

Also fascinating is the fact that plants seem to store their best qualities in their reproductive organs. The flowers, fruits and seeds of plants are the parts which have the most compelling colors, textures, aromas and taste. They attract and invite us to pick them and eat them. We like them so much, we try to grow them in ever-increasing quantities. It's almost as if plants are using us to help them reproduce in higher quantities. Quite interesting.

I wonder if this excessive consumption of sexual food is what makes humans the most highly reproductive species in the world. I can't think of any other species which mate and have babies every second of every day, all through the year.

Desi Frozen Food in Walmart



I don't know what took so long, but it had to happen eventually: desi frozen food had to make its appearance in American grocery stores.

I noticed the above two items - mattar panneer and palak panneer - in a local Walmart. Apologies for the quality of the pictures. They were taken in a hurry using my cellphone.

These were just two items. But this is still a start. Now, I can't wait for the day when Indian grocery items - spices, daals, etc. - will appear on the standard grocery store shelves.

There are very few Indian grocery stores in American cities. The problem is that the Indian merchants don't think big. They are too busy establishing and running small mom-and-pop type Indian grocery stories.

I wish some enterprizing businessman would instead supply Indian grocery, spices, frozen foods, etc. to national grocery food chains and convince them to sell them. Almost every big grocery store in the US has aisles dedicated to Hispanic and Chinese food. There is no reason why Indian items should not occupy some of that shelf-space. They are sure to sell well. They are good for the Indian suppliers, good for the grocery stores and good for us consumers. We don't have to buy goods with expired dates or dubious quality from the desi stores.

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Vulnerability in Love

When a man is in love, he is extremely vulnerable. The lady he is in love with can literally wrap him around her finger. It pleases a man to bring pleasure to his lady, even if it means she has him wrapped around her finger.

The only problem is that, by nature, men are not comfortable being vulnerable. From a very young age, everything they do is aimed at making them invulnerable or at least hiding their vulnerability effectively. True success among men is not measured by money or power, but by how invulnerable a man is to everyone and everything in his life. The less vulnerable a man is, the more successful, safe and content he feels.

So, it is not easy for us to be vulnerable to the women we love. But we can't help it. It is the nature of love to make us vulnerable to those we love. To be in love is to expose our heart and soul to the greatest hurt possible. As such, it is really important to be careful about who we fall in love with.

There are some women who don't respect this vulnerability in men. They think it makes men silly, less masculine. Such women don't value the feels of their men.

Then there are women who use the vulnerability for their own ends, to get what they want. They feel a sense of power by seeing their men being vulnerable to them. Such women are dangerous and to be avoided.

The kind of woman a man should fall for understands his vulnerability. She is touched by it, and she loves him for it. She knows that it is not something which comes easily to a man, and she does not see it as something less masculine. She considers his vulnerability as a big proof of his love for her. Such a woman knows to take the man in her arms and comfort him and let him know that is is okay to be vulnerable with her. She knows to inspire him and encourage him to achieve greater things, because at times of vulnerability, men are very susceptible to suggestions. Such women are not easy to find. Even if a man is lucky enough to find such a woman, she is usually a handful to love and live with.

But the fact is that, a difficult woman who will encourage us and keep us on the right path, is always much more valuable than an easy woman who might lead us and let us go astray. The former is worth every bit of the hardwork we might have to put in for her.