To be truly rich: Multiply!

Posted on December 21, 2004 20:26 PM EST

I am convinced that Addition is not the way to get rich. Multiplication is the way to get truly rich.

You cannot exchange a single hour of labor or a single product of your effort or a single service for money, and hope to get rich. That is not how it seems to work.

I mean, how much money can you make by exchanging hours of labor to dollars? Even if you are a top class consultant, there are only so many hours you can work and bill for in a day. You are constrained by the number of hours in a day and by your physical limitations. What one-of-a-kind product can you produce with your tools and skills, which can bring you a lot of money? How many of such pieces can you make in a day, a month? Just how much money would that be sold for even if you were the greatest painter alive? (Moreover, the worth of your painting is likely to go up after you are dead). The same logic holds for individual services too. Even if you are the best masseuse or hooker in town, there are only so many individual services you can give in a day and you can earn only so much. Your money-making capacity is limited.

I call this making money by Addition. In this method, to earn more money, you have to add to what you deliver or provide: add hours to your working hours, add to the number of one-of-a-kind products you can make, add clients to the individual service you provide. This is a tiresome way of making money and it is severely limited. You may be able to earn a comfortable living, but cannot get really rich this way. I am talking of filthy rich, being rich enough to throw money away, being so rich that you can never correctly tell exactly how much your riches are worth.

Now look at how these people make money: Stephen King writes a book, he writes it once. But he gets money everytime a copy of the book is sold. Millions of copies are sold and he makes millions. With just one time effort. And then the book gets made into a movie. He makes money then. The movie is seen by millions of people, he makes money everytime a person sees the movie. All this with one time effort. Similarly with movie and television producers and actors. They put in a one time effort and earn money on it over and over again. Beyonce earns the same way when she makes a music album. So does the richest person on Earth, Bill Gates, who makes a product once and sells it many times over, with some clever marketing and monopolistic strategies. In case of this last gentleman, it is truly impossible to exactly estimate his worth. It goes up everytime someone buys his product somewhere in the world, and it is a safe bet that his products are bought every hour, perhas even every minutes, day after day.

In each of the above cases, a single effort pays off many times over. Some of these continue to pay over and over through the decades. The money keeps flowing as long as the product is popular and bought with the copyright intact. This is the Multiplicative way of getting rich. On this path, there is no mid-way success. You won't get slotted somewhere in the middle class or upper middle class or some such wimpy category of richness. You will either be well and truly rich, able to afford all the first-class and business class stuff. Or you will go kaput and lose your investment. But the investment often appears to be so low, and the returns so high, the risks seem well worth it.

Clearly, putting your attention and effort into channels which multiply your wealth, rather than add to it, is the way to go. Compound interest (multiplicative/exponential) is always preferred to simple interest (additive).

I could almost convince myself to chuck my day job and put all my effort into writing a best-seller, ya?

Watching the naachwalis!

Posted on December 6, 2004 18:4 PM EST

We had been to this colleague-friend's home for dinner on Saturday. When we gather socially with friends and colleagues, I prefer that we sit together and talk, with may be some background music. But my preference seems to be the exception among most desis I know. These people prefer to switch on the TV, sit in front/around it and then talk! I can't pay attention to the TV nor to the conversation. I hate that atmosphere.

On Saturday, after dinner, people wanted to watch some Hindi movie songs. Our gracious host played a DVD and the big screen filled up with the Sharaara Sharaara song. The video was complete with partially clothed desi babes doing variety of suggestive gyrations. And then it occurred to me!

This is what occurred to me: In the olden days, before the times of movies and TVs, if I wanted to watch a similar dance by similar naachwaalis, not only would I have to shell out a lot of money, I would also earn a very bad reputation for patronizing such "artiste"! Today, I watch it for free, at home, among friends and family of different age groups and both genders, and nobody is bothered.

Coping with love loss

Posted on November 22, 2004 15:16 PM EST

Coping with love loss (not in any particular order):

I wrote this months ago, responding to somebody on Sulekha Coffeehouse who was going through a love loss. This will work even for others who have not really lost love, but just want to be momentarily distracted from the aches and pains that love brings at times. I was responding to a female poster, so this list is oriented that way. If you are male, I am sure you can customize it to suit your particlar preferences.

Good luck! May you get the peace and love you desire and deserve. Here's the list:

1. Give in to the emotions. Scream, cry, moan, rant. Feel the emotions run through you. Don't resist emotions. Emotion = energy in motion. Moving energy = healthy energy.

2. Listen to the countless sad songs from Indian movies - old to new.

3. Take the opportunity to pamper yourself with an expensive gift - something you have wanted for a long time, but did not dare spend so much on.

4. Go to parties. Throw a party yourself.

5. Get slammed with alcohol, grass. Do it with close friends. Have a great time laughing silly, crying silly, bad-mouthing him silly, throwing up silly, hangingover silly. Please don't drink and drive, though.

6. Get great books and movies. Everytime you find yourself thinking of him... pull up the book or movie to immerse yourself into it.

7. Go on a road trip, package tour, long hike.

8. Wander aimlessly around town - walking or driving.

9. Have a whirlwind affair or two. Just be careful not to break your heart again during this affair or break somebody else's heart. You would be surprised what magic the attentions of a new person can do to your mood and ego.

10. Have a ton of chocolates of different type deposited all around the house. Eat them whenever the blues strike. Just don't become a chocolate addict or become overweight.

11. If you are overweight use the anger and emotions to work out the weight. If you are underweight, use the chocolates and other rich food to put on some weight. If you are medium weight, go around showing it off in expensive, flattering clothes.

12. Write your love story in a journal, in a letter, as a "fictional" story.

13. Spend endless hours chatting online, telling your love story to anybody who will listen.

14. Pick a fight with online guys, then breakdown and tell them your sob story, allow them to comfort you.

15. Write blue poems.

16. Spend time with animals, children.

17. Get a new hair-style, get a manicure, get a pedicure, get a facial, get a long pampering massage.

18. Write letters to him. Don't send them to him. Tear them up and burn them. Or keep them for posterity.

19. Visit old friends and teachers and neighbors you have not seen in a long, long time.

20. Smile at strangers, talk to strangers - old, young, kids, all genders. You would be surprised how much power you have as a woman to make people feel good simply by smiling and talking to them. And their good feeling will not fail to flow back to you.

21. Cook up a storm. Try new recipes. Make paapads and sandige (in Kannada) / vattals (in Tamil) and pickles for the whole year. Make cookies for everyone you know. Make chaats for your family.

22. Be a total b1tch to anyone you come across until someone slaps you or you have had enough yourself.

23. Redecorate your house. Redo your garden.

24. Go window shopping.

25. Do volunteer work.

26. Visit old childhood haunts, or places you hung around with him.

27. Spend as much time with your family as possible. If you have pampering grandparents or uncles/aunts, take a vacation staying over with them.

28. Cry yourself off to sleep. But don't cry soon as you wake up.

29. If all of the above fails, talk to me. I am very empathic and understanding. I am good at helping people feel comforted and better. ;-)

30. Pay me for the last 45 minutes or so I spent typing out these suggestions at work! Pay me in cash or at least in smiles.

Flowers, insects and love

Posted on November 19, 2004 2:2 AM EST

The point is, what's so wonderful, is that everyone of these flowers has a specific relationship with the insect that pollinates it. There's a certain orchid looks exactly like a certain insect. So, the insect is drawn to this flower... it's double, it's soulmate... and wants nothing more than to make love to it. After the insect flies off, it spots another soul-mate flower and makes love to it, thus pollinating it. And neither the flower nor the insect will ever understand the significance of their lovemaking. How could they know that because of their little dance the world lives? It does. By simply doing what they're designed to do something large and magnificent happens. In this sense, they show us how to live. How the only barometer you have is your heart. How when you spot your flower, you cannot let anything get in your way.

- John Laroche in movie Adaptation

Follow this link to read an interesting discussion of this quote on Sulekha Coffeehouse: Adaptation Quote Discussion

My final comments in the above discussion:

Looking at the responses on this thread, I have been surprised (and a little disappointed) at the narrow and literal interpretations. I am reminded of the time when I told my grandchildren that they should be like the bees. The young dears ran around the garden, from flower to flower, kissing them. I had to gather them and bring them back inside to tell them that I really meant they should be hard working team players. The young dears who have responded to this thread seem to be showing-off that they are grown-up by talking of (in)fidelity and polyamory. Dear, dear! They have concluded that this message is about jumping from lover to lover.

Some alternative tracks for your train of thoughts:

1. When the insect leaves one flower and moves on to another flower, do you think it is still thinking of the previous flower in any manner or form? Or has it made a clean break from one flower and moved on to the next? If there is a clean break, how could it be polyamory, which by definition is having relationships with more than one person? So, may be the gist of this message is to make a clean break when a relationship ends and to be totally involved and devoted when a relationship is going.

2. The flowers are separated by distance and cannot really travel to one another. Yet, they manage to establish a connection, to share something special, to love, to mate and to help the "world live". They accomplish this without even leaving their places. Is that possible for our hearts? Can we love despite being separated by distances of any kind (geographic, mental, etc.)?

3. It is the natural way of the insects to fly from flower to flower. The insect can't just spend its whole life on one flower or die after "making love" to one flower. The insect is being perfectly true to its nature in what it does, in the way it lives and loves. So, if this message tells us we should love like the flowers and the insects, perhaps it is telling us to love in way that is true to our nature. And not encouraging us to fly from one flower to another (unless that is our true nature).

4. Although the message says the insect and the flower are soul-mates and the insect makes love to the flower, is this really the case? The true mating happens between the flowers and the insect is only a messenger. So, the true lovers are the flowers.

5. The insect is not consciously helping the flowers mate. The insect goes from flower to flower for its own purposes, perhaps for its own mates. So, the insects are also true lovers too.

6. Perhaps that is gist of the message. That the insects, the flowers, everyone are true lovers who make the "world live" by living and loving as per their true nature.

7. There is no need to really speculate or think too much. The central point of the message is in the message itself: the only barometer you have is your heart. when you spot your flower, you cannot let anything get in your way.

PS: When I heard those lines in the movie Adaptation, I did not even think of polyamory or the fleeting nature of love (the insect flies from flower to flower). The thought that first came to me and stayed was that we are all lovers - flowers, insects, all - and by loving in a way that is true to our nature, we make the world live. Feels good to know I have not lost the innocence and idealism of love. :)

Literal Interpretation of Spiritual Scriptures

Posted on November 16, 2004 18:8 PM EST

Spiritual scriptures are mostly about spirit, about the soul, about the non-physical aspects of God/dess. They are less about the physical world and its workings. The scriptures talk of the physical world and its workings only in the context of spirituality. For example, they may not contain descriptions of how an electric motor works. But they may describe what effect the consumption of certain physical foods might have on the physical body, and in turn on the subtle bodies, and how these influence the spiritual progress of a person.

When the scriptures are more about spirit, the interpretation should be partial to the spirit of what is being said. Not the literal meaning.

Most organized religions make the mistake of interpreting things literally. Even people who are supposed to be wise and intelligent make this mistake. Consequently, they miss the experience of the divine forest, becoming overly involved with individual trees. Often, they are not even involved with something as big as a tree, it is the trivial distractions of a tiny blade of grass or a thorn that takes up all the energy and concentration.

Consequently, the message of the scriptures become divisive instead of uniting forces, at all levels - personal, relationships, social, national, international. Personal growth is sacrificed, love is lost, society is divided, nations are weakened and they go to war. This makes no sense. This is not the way of smart, evolved people. It is like burning the forest just because a thorn pricked us.

It is in the nature of the forest to have thorns. Let us thread carefully with open eyes. It is in the nature of the spiritual world to have different interpretions, many of which may seem contradictory. Let us not allow them to confound and blind us. Let us keep open minds and open hearts. Let us live and grow in love and ananda.

Wet Deepavali with the Wife

Posted on November 12, 2004 20:25 PM EST

Continued from this one: Grilled Veggie Burrito

The weather was absolutely gorgeous as I walked through Downtown Phoenix, on the way to Baja Fresh. It was the kind of weather that makes me sing Ghanan Ghanan. (Listening to it now).

These cloudy days are so rare in Phoenix. Today it was totally cloudy. It was neele megh shaam (not Shyam! :)). Like a romantic Deepavali evening should be. I found myself wishing even more that the gf was with me. Since there is no gf, I call a friend who is a girl. During times like these she pings me on Yahoo and leaves the message: "Hey, baahar dekha? Mausam bahut shaayaraana hai". She has just woken up from a siesta and when I tell her that I called because the weather is so beautiful outside, she laughs and says, "Paagal ho!" The whole world knows that by now.

Grilled veggie burrito was yummy. The marinated peppers and Cholula sauce were yummier. I had taken a book with me to read while eating, but I did not feel like reading. Just wanted to enjoy the food and the atmosphere and my thoughts. I look at myself in the mirror while eating and wipe the burrito-juice from the end of my moustache. I did not feel like washing my hair this morning, instead I oiled it. With the oiled hair and thick fleece lumber-jack shirt, I look like a red-neck from India. Damn! That means, I have to go home, shave, shower and change before going to the friend's house this evening where I am invited for Deepavali dinner. I hope we get to play Uno there.

By the time I finish lunch and walk out with the glass of water-with-ice-and-lemon-slice, it has started raining. I step out right into the rain. I love walking in the rain. I love the feel of cold rain drops on my face. They are like countless tiny wet kisses from the rain goddess. Rain drops fall in my glass of water. I find myself thinking of the gf again. Only now, she has become my wife. Wishing I was not walking back to work. Wishing I was going back home, to my wife who is clean and dressed and smelling good and ready to do Lakshmi puja. She'd help dry my head with a towel (when my mom tried drying my hair as a kid, I always got irritated and pushed her hands away). After I am washed and changed and ready, we'd worship the goddess praying her to keep us on the path of Dharma, Artha, Kama and Moksha, praying that we are always content and happy together in our life. Then we would have a quick snack and go out for a drive in the rain. We'd stop at some place in the open desert, step out of the car and enjoy the rain. I'd lean her against the car and kiss her and we'd come back home...

By now I have reached my office and proceed to type out this blog. One more last report to run, print and I will be out of here.

Happy Deepavali to all!

Grilled Veggie Burrito

Posted on November 12, 2004 19:9 PM EST

It's 4:46 PM and I have not had lunch yet. I had a late breakfast and waited for hunger to kick in... and generally procrastinated. Now I am raging hungry. And wish I had a gf who was here. No, you are not misreading. I typed hungry and not horny, yet want the gf here. No idea why! The hunger must be messing with my brain.

I am gonna go have the grilled veggie burrito from Baja Fresh. There is a fancy Mexican restaurant here, closer to where I work. For the same price or may be a few cents lesser, I can get a veggie burrito served to me at this restaurant, unlike the self-service Baja Fresh. Yet, I will go to Baja which is at least 10-15 times farther. I like the burrito there. I also like their salsa. And they have hot Mexican sauces (Cholula and La Victoria, I think) which this fancy restaurant doesn't have. I also like their marinated peppers. Yes, I know, I like it hot and spicy!

Gosh, just thinking about the food makes me drool. If I don't go soon I will start moaning with hunger. BRB!

Continued here: Wet Deepavali with the Wife

Still-born child

Posted on October 22, 2004 17:36 PM EST

There is a funereal pall to the day. One day I am given a vision of beauty and love and contentment. The next day I am told that the people in the vision looked content and peaceful because they were dead! How can beauty and love and happiness turn to death so quickly? What happened here? How is it even possible? It is like the child did not even have time to breath after being born. It was still-born. I am not able to get over it. I might never get over it.

Poem of the moment - Eat, my son, eat by M Udayakala

Posted on October 16, 2004 10:24 AM EST

Eat, my son, eat by M Udayakala

`Where was I all these years, mother?' `In the womb of my desire.'
`And you, mother?' `In the dreams of your father, my dear.'
`And father, what was he doing?' `He was in search of us both.'
`Son dear, it is time for you to eat now.' `Mother!' `Yes.'
`Why should I eat?' `To become strong like Rama.'
`Who was Rama?'
`You have already forgotten that story! Rama was also a child
like you. One day he cried for the Moon in the sky. His mother
showed him the Moon in a mirror to make him smile. Now we
worship Him. He's our God.'
`Why is Rama our God?'
`Because He punished all the bad people with his bow and arrow.'
`Like the one I play with?'
`Yes, but with one still bigger than yours.'
`Why did Rama punish them?' `They were all bad, dear little one.'
`What is bad, mother?' `That which is not good.'
`What is good, mother?' `You are good, son.'
`And you, mother?'
`Good when you smile like the full moon in the blue sky;
Bad when you smear your body with all the dust in the world!'
`Mother, I will always be good.' `Eat, then.'
`I will, if you sing a song.'
`You naughty boy, may Hanuman protect you, my little monkey!

Even before I was married to your father and crossed the doorstep
of this mud house,
You were born in my dreams when as a child I was playing with my
pretty dolls of wood;
Little one, if you smile, the world for me is a heaven brought
to the Earth,
But if you cry, my heart quivers as the leaf does when the mad
wind blows past it.

`Eat, my son, eat now.'

-The End-

Best Eateries in Portland (Vegetarian Special)

Posted on October 8, 2004 17:47 PM EST

I am a pure vegetarian (no meat, no eggs). The following recommendations in Portland have great food to suit my preferences.

Indian Food - The Real Taste of India : The best Indian food I have eaten in Portland is not in a restaurant or home. It is from a cart (rather a small RV van) which is parked on a downtown parking lot. It is called The Real Taste of India. It used to be called simply the Taste of India. But it was so popular that another Indian food cart was set up on the same parking lot with the name The New Taste of India. So the Punju family changed theirs to The Real Taste of India. So remember, you are looking for The Real Taste of India, NOT the New Taste of India. The portions are generous. The taste authentic. The price fabulous. Most vegetarian dishes are $4.50. Max cost $5.00. Be sure to try their vegetable biriyani or their vegetarian thali. Like I said the portions are truly big and one order with a drink and sides is easily shared with a companion. This cart is located on 5th Ave and Stark St, downtown Portland. Cash only.

Curry Leaf : All the time I was in Portland, I moaned about the lack of good Indian restaurants there. All the traditional ones are your usual jaded, lifeless ones serving same old boring North Indian food. God forbid you order South Indian food in any of these restaurants. I did that mistake just once and almost cried over the horrible dosa and the vada which wouldn't break even after soaking in sambar (they did not charge us for the vada). But why talk of the bad stuff, let's talk about the Curry Leaf! Apparently this place was started by a bunch of South Indian housewives who decided to put their talent to work. The result is a place that serves awesome South Indian food in Beaverton (15325 NW Central Drive). I was fortunate to eat here during a recent visit to Portland. The South Indian buffet (after a hike in the Columbia River Gorge) was an uplifting experience, although we were filled with food upto our neck. The 2nd and 4th Sunday of the month are South Indian Buffet days, and this includes 5 kinds of mini-dosas. Eat as much as you like (I tasted all five!). The 1st and 3rd Sunday are North Indian Chaat buffet days. Should time my next visit so that I get to taste this.

Lebanese - Nicholas's : This place has fantabulous food. It is unarguably the best Lebanese (or any Mediterranean) food in Portland, may be all of Oregon. Heck probably all of the American Northwest. It is crowded during lunch or dinner times and the wait can be as much as 45 min. The important thing about this place is the food, not privacy. So, you will easily brush elbows with all kinds of Portlanders - yuppies, hippies, students, goths, execs, etc. I once met the President and founder of Tazo tea here. The food is so fresh and so yummy. They have a Vegan combo and a Vegetarian combo. The falafels are the most perfect that I have ever eaten. Fried to perfect texture and bursting with flavor and aroma. They also have a yummy peach shake (or was it juice) and yummy desserts. The portions are generous, especially on the combos. I highly recommend the vegan or vegetarian combo. Ask the waiter. S/he may be able to mix and match a few items between these combos to customize it for you. Don't miss out on the spinach pie and a dish called marakesh which are found on these combos. Located on Grand Avenue and Pine St. in SE Portland. Cash only.

Thai - Thai Pepper : Portland is a good place for some great Thai food. I really liked Thai Pepper in Downtown Portland (Front Ave and Pine St). They are certainly open for lunch on weekdays. But they seem to be rather erratic for dinner/weekends. Or may be I was just unlucky. I never found them open when I went there for dinner or during weekends. There are several other Thai places downtown, which I heard are good. You may search for them online. There is also Sweet Basil (3135 NE Broadway). This place is a bit expensive, a bit gourmet, a bit pretentious, but I liked the taste. Then there is Eagle Thai! Located on NE 8th AVe and Broadway. This is close to the place where I used to work. And ALL my desi colleagues went here without fail EVERY Friday. They just could not moved to consider any other choice on Fridays. This place is quite popular with the desi crowd, but not so with SE Asians who are sticklers for authentic Thai food. If you are not a stickler for authentic taste, but enjoy great taste, you may visit this place. If you are willing to drive West of Portland to Beaverton, there is another fabulous placed called Thai Angel (3829 SW Hall Blvd). I highly recommmend this place. Great service, better food.

Cajun - Le Bistro Montage : Located right under the Morrison Bridge on the Eastside of Portland (301 SE Morrison St). Must be the best Cajun restaurant in Portland. One of the few Portland restaurants open till 2 AM in the morning (Sat and Sun nights, open until 4 AM, next day). The neighborhood is not all that great. Nor is the interior of the restaurant "classy rich", but the ambience and the food is really good. This is a great place to take your date out for a quiet evening with candlelight and talk. Most of the tables are community style - a long row with chairs on either side and strangers sitting at the same table. So if the place is very crowded, the romantic talk with your date might not be quite so private. But every time I have have been there, we have had no problem finding a spot a little away from the others. I don't remember all the vegetarian selections they have. I have had the vegetarian Jambalaya over rice and they have a variety of mac-n-cheese, some of them quite spicy. They also have yummy cornbread on the side. I don't remember if this is served free as an appetizer or if it comes on the side with certain orders. But do ask for it and eat it with honey or butter.

Ethiopian - Abol Cafe : When I discovered and frequented Abol Cafe, it was let us say, quite unsophisticated. I have had an experience of being served on paper plate and paper cups here and too when I took my friends there for the first time. I am not sure if they have gotten their act together yet. Needless to say my friends were totally unimpressed and quite doubted that they had made a good decision by trusting me and coming there. But what this place lacks for finesse, it more than adequately makes up for in taste and heart. My friends' hearts and tummies were won over by the time we left the place. This is a total home setup. The living quarters and kitchen are in the basement and the sitting area on the ground level. The food is cooked by the elderly woman of the house in her own kitchen. Quite often she took the orders and served it herself. She did not calculate the dollars and portions. She just served with an open heart and hands. The food was the most delicious and authentic Ethiopian food I have ever tried. The staple Ethiopian food is the injera bread which is not much different from a thick dosa, although the flour can be sometimes more sour than the typical dosa. This bread is eaten with different kinds of curries. They have a vast selection of yummy vegetarian and meat-based curries, much like Indian cuisine. Some of them spicy, some of them mild. The traditional way of eating is for everything to be served in one big plate and people sitting around the one plate and sharing food. This is how it is served in most Ethiopian restaurants. We desis asked for and got our own individual plates. This place came up with an innovation that no other Ethiopian restaurants in Portland had at that time. They introduced the lunch buffet for just 6 bucks. I think the buffet is pure vegetarian, no meat dishes. You have to order meat separately. The typical Ethiopian restaurant serves just one curry per order. So, this buffet with a variety of curries is great, and let's you taste all the typical Ethiopian dishes. Since this place is basically a home, sometimes social visitors (relatives and friends of the owners) walked in and greeted all the customers with a friendly smile. Ethiopians don't look like the typical Africans. They look more like a mix of South Indian, African and Egyptian features. One such visitor at the restaurant was a young lady with a vivacious smile and friendly personality. She passed us by like a breeze smelling of rare pleasant intoxicating herbs, greeting us and asking how we liked the food. It must have taken all of 45 seconds. I never saw her again. I will never forget her. Mmmmm! If this place is closed when you visit, you may try Mudai Restaurant which is just a couple of blocks west from Abol Cafe on Broadway.

Italian - Pastini Pastaria : I love Italian food. But I have not visited any of the expensive Italian restaurants in Portland. In fact, the only other Italian restaurant I have visited in Portland is probably the Olive Garden chain. But don't let my lack of experience be the sole judge of Pastini. This restaurant has been voted as one of the top "cheap eats" in the country! That's right, it is called cheap eat because of the cost of food, but the food in no way lacks for quality and taste. They have so many different kinds of pasta dishes to choose from. Just see the menu here. Whenever I have been here with friends, we order different dishes and share. You just can't be satisfied tasting only one dish from the available selections. Don't let the "cheap" tag throw you off regarding the location and ambience of the place. It is located in beautiful commercial neighborhood in the Lloyd District, has a nice, clean ambience, courteous staff and frequented by office-goers and Lloyd Mall shoppers. If you like Italian food and are in Portland, you just should not miss this place. And of course, the Olive Garden is pretty good too. It was one of our favorite places to go to after a day long hike in the Columbia River Gorge and we were absolutely famished. Olive Garden in Lake Oswego is the last restaurant I visited when I still lived in Portland. Since then, I have not visited another Olive Garden at the time of this writing.

Mexican - La Carreta : I can't believe I am posting last about Mexican food, considering that this is one of my favorite foreign cuisines and Mexican must be the most eaten and dated foreign food for me in Portland. I guess I just did not think of writing about a Mexican restaurant because frankly I don't know the the best Mexican restaurant in Portland. All of the above restaurants I have mentioned, I can bet, are some of the best in their class in Portland. Don't let that make you think La Carreta is not all that great. It has a rating of 9.3 out of 10 on Portland Citysearch. So that must count for something. The food is great, the drinks are great, the service is great, they have daily specials on food and drinks. This place too has sentiments attached to it because this is the last restaurant I visited with my Northwest gf!

I have to make a special mention of the beloved Northwest bakery, Grand Central. As a kid in India, I have often bought "special bread" in Bangalore bakeries. Grand Central showed me how special bread can be.

And I cannot end this without telling you about NE Broadway Street in Portland. This is an amazing street for the variety of food choices it presents. It has everything that you can think of within 3 miles starting at I-5 in the West and going East. There are at least 6 fast food restaurants, at least 3 Ethiopian, at least 4 Thai, at least two Chinese, one Japanese, two Asian bistros, one Italian, one pizzeria, at least 3 burger-pizza-fries kinda American fare, bakeries, coffee shops, etc. Some of the restaurants I have mentioned above are on this street. It is amazing. When I was in Portland, my office was very close to this street and I lunched at a different place daily. I really really miss this place here in dry Phoenix. Just one of the many great Northwest things I miss!

For Portland visitors: Portland in Oregon

Indian Expletives

Posted on October 6, 2004 17:25 PM EST

Unlike English, most Indian slang and expletives cannot be picked up by simply watching movies. One has to spend time on location - market place, construction sites, play grounds, college/highschool campus - in order to truly know the local slang and expletives.

Consequently native expletives are more potent than English ones. One is kinda used to and indifferent towards English expletives. I mean, imagine someone exclaiming "s*hit" in a native Indian language in public! It would sound very bad and degenerate. Yes, this same word is so commonplace in English among people of all types.

I am not much into using expletives myself. But I like to know them for their entertainment value. Since it is hard to know the Indian expletives without spending time on location, I think a book about Indian expletives might sell well. How about publishing a humorous coffee book of Indian expletives?

Portland in Oregon

Posted on October 4, 2004 15:39 PM EST

Wow! You are so lucky to be in Portland. And that too FOUR days. I wish our places were exchanged right now, despite what you say about being busy at this conference most of the time and having only evenings free. Here are things to see right in Portland:

Portland - Downtown and surrounding

Pioneer Square Area - this is the very heart of downtown. There is a cute little open square. People hang out here all day long. Starbucks in one corner. Hippies and goths closeby playing chess, ball, etc. Pigeons, fountains, etc.

Pioneer Place Mall - Mall right by Pioneer square. Typical downtown mall spread across several blocks, connected by underground and overhead path ways.

Downtown Library - beautiful place. Beautiful building. Saturdays and Sundays they have events going on. I think Saturday 3 pm is Jazz time every week. Free show. Very nice.

Downtown area has numerous restaurants and shops of all kinds. Just walk around and see. All of the above places are within five min walking distance of each other.

From downtown, you can walk/take bus to Pearl District. It's just 5-10 min away. This place has many nice arts shops. Kinda like the yuppie living quarters.

10-15 min away from Downtown is the NW 21st and 23rd Avenues. This is a busy hippy-yuppy area. It's fun to just walk up and down these streets, check out the various stores and restaurants. I really love places like these. Hawthorne is another similar street in SE Portland. It is 15-20 min away by bus from Downtown.

Right by downtown is the Willamette River front park. Nice place to walk, run, watch people. It's especially great to hang out here on warm weekend afternoons. During the warm season they have numerous events and festivals and gatherings happening here. May be something might be going on right when you are visiting.

Saturday Market - Closeby the waterfront park is Saturday market. It's a bunch of temporary stalls put by local artists and craftsmen. There's food and music and lots of interesting stores. IT's on every Saturday and Sunday, day time hours only. They close it down during the winter months, but it is definitely on now.

If you happen to go to Hawthorne Street in SE Portland (I suggest you do), there is a little treasure that almost no visitors and even most residents don't know about. Very close to intersection of Hawthorne and 12th or 15th street is a residential neighborhood where the streets kind of spiral around a very special rose garden. It's beautiful. Many different types of rose planted on a plot of land in the middle of the neighborhood. I once spent better part of an hour or more walking around this garden in moonlight, smelling the roses with a date. It is not easy to find this garden. Go to Hawthorne and 12th street and ask somebody at a store or a passing local. They might direct you to it.

And of course there are also the beautiful Portland bridges. Drive up and down all of them. Walk if possible. Each one is a different structure. Gives awesome views of the city and the Willamette river.

Max Train - Portland and neighboring towns are connected by the Max train. It's a two car train. Very convenient for locals. It's fun to ride this train up and down. From downtown the journey to the last stop on the East is about 1.5 hours and a similar duration for the last stop on the West. So, you could drive by car close to a park-and-ride stop towards either end of the train line (suggest the Gresham end) and then ride the train up and down. Nice timepass for 3 hours, watching all the different kinds of local landscape and local people. The train goes through suburbs and downtown and across river. Some beautiful views of the city and Mt Hood (if you are luckY) and the river. There was a time when I used to travel this train everyday. Every time I go by this train and it crosses the Steel Bridge over the Willamette, I get my favorite view of the bridges across the Willamette. I put all my thoughts aside and have a zen moment just taking in the beauty of the river, the bridges, the open sky, the city.

Zoo, Arboretum, Rose Garden & Japanese Garden
We of Portland is the zoo, arboretum (just a big park with many different kinds of trees), Rose Garden (diff from one described above) and Japanese Garden. You could spend an afternoon-evening checking these out. The arboretum is a nice place to go for a walk. This whole area is set on the Portland Westhills. There are some places from which you can see Mt Hood and other in the distance. The effect is such that you feel as if there is no sprawling city between there and the far off mountains. It's wonderful.

Outside Portland

Multnomah Falls - Almost anybody who visits the Portland areas goes on a pilgrimage to Multnomah falls. It is by I-84 East, around 2 hours out of Portland. This falls is in the Columbia River Gorge area. The whole Gorge is a paradise, especially for hikers. You probably don't have enough time to check it all out. If you visit Multnomah Falls with time on your hands, I suggest hiking upto the top of the falls. It is just a mile one-way, I think. You get a sample of the kind of hiking trails and views the gorge has to offer.

Canon Beach - About 2-3 west of Portland. Beautiful beach. Beautiful little beach town. A little to the North of Canon Beach is Seaside. Another nice beach and cute little beach town.

That's just a few suggestions. I have left out scores of other places. This hardly does justice to the place nor to the feelings and sentiments I have associated with each of them.

Must see pics: http://www.oregonscenics.com/

Next weblog: Best Eateries in Portland (Vegetarian Special)

Historical Fiction - Kaveri Stories

Posted on September 21, 2004 17:9 PM EST

I love reading historical fiction. The kind of books I have read are the ones that cover several decades/centuries narrating events of historical importance through the observing/participating eyes of fictional characters who span several generations. Often the main characters belong to a handful of families, and there is a continuity of these families through history.

Caribbean (about the Caribbean islands) and Texas (about the TX state, of course) are two books by James Michener which I really enjoyed, especially Caribbean. I have read several other such books by Michener and plan to read 'em all. I also thoroughly enjoyed Wilbur Smith's Ballantyne Series of books set in Rhodesia, which is now Zimbabwe.

I dream of reading such historical fiction set in India. They would be so rich and entertaining and enjoyable. More importantly, they would feel so close to heart and soul. Alas! My dream seems to be destined to remain a dream in the absence of any great literary movement in India. Literature in local languages seem to be all but dying away. Moreover, people in India seem to be so bloody insecure. There will invariably be controversies and problems over conflicts and differences that authentic historical research will bring up. This will discourage many authors from being brave and truthful.

I myself want to write a historical book, a series of short stories spread across history and located along the Kaveri river. The introduction to the book will contain the mythological story (or stories) of the birth of the river. My actual first story will be set in Kodagu, the birthplace of Kaveri, and at the oldest point in time. Perhaps it will be the story of a brave Kodava warrior. Then, there will be the popular story set in Talakad, of course. May be I will write the story of Sir M Vishveshwaraiah and the construction of Krishnaraja Sagar dam. There will be a tragic-suicidal story of lovers at Hoganekal falls. May be the heroine of that particular story will be named Kaveri. There has to be a story of violence between Kannnidagas and Tamizhs over Kaveri water. Perhaps a story of spiritual upliftment set in Srirangam. I will follow the river through geography and time, setting each subsequent story at places downriver, at different points of time, until the rivers joins the Bay of Bengal. I would love to write the stories in the local language and dialects. The readers should get a total immersion experience of the river Kaveri by the time they finish the book. With my training (or lack of it) in research and writing, it will be an arduous task.

May be I could make this a project for my (imaginary for now) literature class. Send promising students of my class to different places along the Kaveri, ask them to research the local history and language, come up with stories. At the end of the year, we shall collect the stories together and the class shall go on a long trip visiting places where the stories are set. In each of these places we shall have story narrations, plays, etc. We will make a documentary of our project. We will also make a TV series of the stories, in the authentic local dialects. Nice dream.

These traditions and systems of "elders"!

Posted on September 17, 2004 19:51 PM EST

The traditions and systems of elders are supposed to guide, support and protect us. What right do they have to make us compromise on our principles and break our hearts?

Libran-Lover-who-stands-by-and-watches-helpless

PS: I am no god!

Mood of the hour :(

Posted on September 17, 2004 12:51 PM EST

Wanted me to miss you more than usual?

Or is your desire to talk to me much less than mine to talk to you?

In either case: :(

The Greater Hurt

Posted on September 12, 2004 14:25 PM EST

Discovered what the greater hurt is today. It is not when someone hurts me. The greater hurt is when I hurt someone, and then I find myself hurting because that someone is hurting. Painful!

Philosophy and Mathematics

Posted on September 12, 2004 8:38 AM EST

"That is just too idealistic", "Enough of the philosophy", "Easy to say in theory, can't implement in practice". We have all said something like this at one time or another. Often, this is our reaction when we are faced with problems, crises, dilemmas, hurt, failure or some such uncomfortable life situation, and some wise guy opens his mouth to give a philosophical explanation or an idealistic solution.

Perhaps, that is not the right time for philosophy or ideals. It would be analogous to being adrift in a boat on the ocean, with no navigational aids and someone giving us a mouthful of some advanced theorem in analytical geometry. At that time, we can't listen to the theory, the philosophy, the ideals. Our energy and attention is too focussed on the issue of survival and protecting ourselves from more danger/discomfort. So, we turn away from the philosophy and the philosopher. We might even resent them. And this resentment might be carried over to our later life, when the crisis has passed. If we are wiser, on reaching safer shores, we recall the theory/philosophy, understand it and learn how to use it, so that next time we are faced with a similar situation, we are better equipped. That is called learning from experience.

We learn more easily and readily the theories that help us solve physical problems. What's more, these theories can be engineered into packaged solutions that are easily usable without the user having to understand the underlying theory. For example, if we are adrift on the ocean, and someone were to give us a handheld GPS system, our navigational problems are solved. We don't have to understand all the scientific and technological mumbo-jumbo that went into creating that GPS system. All we need to know is to use it. That easy.

But it is not so easy when it comes to the subtler realms of mind, emotions and spirituality. There is almost never an engineered, package solution in this realm. We have to do the hard work of understanding the philosophy, the wisdom and making it our own. We have to learn ways to apply it to our life and our world to help us reach the shores of happiness and peace which we desire and deserve. It takes discipline, courage, honesty and other evolved faculties as well as evolved attitudes to acquire wisdom from books or lectures or even hindsight after the difficult circumstance has passed. It takes even more courage and evolved faculties to learn and earn this wisdom while being in the middle of the crisis.

It is for this reason, a philosopher should be respected. I am no philosopher, but I don't think true blue philosophers thought up their philosophies while being comfortably - symbolically or physically - fed, drunk and loved. Wisdom is earned from some compulsion or drive, from discomfort or pain, by going through trying circumstances. Wisdom is earned by opening the eyes and ears and mind and heart and soul, by incorporating a certain resilience and acceptance into our spirits and being - during and/or after the pain and the crisis. Philosophers deserve respect for going through those difficulties and coming out with open eyes and hearts and resilient spirits.

But the more important thing to remember is not respecting philosophers or their philosophies. The more important thing is to accept that philosophy is not just some theory or idea which is too idealistic or too out there or too mumbo jumbo. The most important thing is to realize that just as theorems in advanced mathematics help give us commonplace comforts like our cooking range, our houses, our cars, our computers - countless other tangible things of practical use, philosophical ideas and ideals do have practical uses in our life, to help us achieve the love, happiness and peace we seek. Ideals and philosophy certainly demand more work and discipline and courage from us, but that is the price to pay when the prize is all that we desire and deserve.

Bangalore's image now muddied even in int'l news

Posted on August 11, 2004 21:11 PM EST

Click here: India's silicon valley faces IT exodus

The condition in Bangalore is to be experienced to be believed.

Most of Bangalore's tech companies are in Koramangala and Electronic City area, right? Electronic City (E-City) is the extreme Southern suburb of Bangalore. Koramangala is in the South of Bangalore too. Both these places are right by Hosur road, which goes to Hosur and thence to other places in Tamilnadu. This highway is THE busiest road out of Bangalore to Tamilnadu. As such, even if these tech companies were not present, this would be quite a busy highway.

This highway shot into notoriety years ago when the then Karnataka govt was totally apathetic to it's worsening condition and the tech companies got so fed up that they sent their own employees to work on the road. This is true. Literally. Employees of Infosys and other companies took road repair implements and got on the street.

Today, despite the much improved state of this road, and a fly-over at what used to be the notoriously congested Madivala circle, this road has gained another kind of notoriety. It is a fact that after moving most of its Bangalore operations to E-City, one of India's foremost software services company alone has lost the life of one or more employee per year on this very road! I don't know about the lives lost from other companies, among the general public and the number of injuries. The flyover at Madivala circle has relieved the congestion at the circle, and simply moved it to the stretch barely 1 km North, near the Madivala market and masjid, I hear.

The story of Hosur road aside, what happens daily is that, thousands of people travel to Koramangala and E-City from all parts of Bangalore. This translates to hundreds of buses, two-wheelers and cars. Because of this heavy traffic to these areas, as well as the general heavy traffic in Bangalore, combined with the bad condition of the roads, just going to work is a chore for Bangalore's techies. It is harrassing and tiring.

People who are not fortunate enough to live close to Koramangala and E-City, easily spend 3-4 hours daily just commuting to work. Can you believe it? The duration of commute is almost 50% of the number of hours spent working in office! Adding the commute time to the 8+ hours one is required to put in at office, over 12 hours are spent just for work daily. And this without working overtime. If there are rains, which paralyze Bangalore traffic quite easily, and/or if one works overtime, which seems to be the norm in tech companies, the 12 hours could even stretch upto 15 hours! What quality of life is this?

I am not defining quality of life based on American standards. All I am asking is some respect for humanity. I believe that the lack of infrastructure, facilities, bad services, most of the problems in India are not because of lack of resources of any kind. It's simply because of the lack of respect for humanity, human dignity and even human life.

A mass transit system, such as an underground railway, is the emergency need of the hour for Bangalore. But I wouldn't be surprised if I my yet-to-be-born children have started to work by the time this becomes a reality.

Try it in the following places!

Posted on August 4, 2004 18:24 PM EST

I would like to try it in the following places:

1. Airplane restroom when flying through turbulence, with both of us drunk.

2. In space with zero gravity.

3. Standing up behind a waterfall.

4. Back of a moving car with tinted windows, while it is being driven through crowded Indian streets.

5. On top of the running washing machine in the community laundry room, late in the night, with the possibility of getting caught.

6. If you hike up Kumaraparvata in Karnataka on a clear day, from the top of the mountain, you can see rolling hills on all sides, reaching far into the horizon, looking like an ocean of stones, with waves and all, in suspended animation. Would love to reach there at sunset, tired from the day's hike and make slow, sweet, exhausted love, with that vista of ocean of hills spread all around us.

7. Under the full moon, star-filled clear sky, in the deserts outside Phoenix, on a balmy night.

8. In a houseboat on a Kashmiri lake or the backwaters of Kerala.

9. On a secluded beach in Goa, early in the cool morning breeze.

10. When there is a wedding in the family and the house is full of relatives... Would be nice to make quiet love under a shared blanket, on top of the terrace, open to the starry night, with relatives sleeping all around us and the possibility of getting caught.

11. In my home balcony, on the swing, while a Bangalore thunderstorm raged around us.

12. In the shower, while being barely awake.

13. On the dining table, just before breakfast.

14. Crowded clothing store's trial room. The store is crowded, not the trial room. :D

15. Quickie in the verandah, just before leaving for work.

Oh, I could go on and on!

Indian Small Businesses

Posted on July 19, 2004 4:10 AM EST (from Bangalore, India)

Most small businesses in India are remarkably inconsiderate about customer satisfaction and customer relationship. I had read about the importance of customer satisfaction and relationship many times before. But it took a few years of experience with American businesses and reacquaintance with Indian businesses for me to be able to compare the two, and truly appreciate the importance of customer satisfaction and relationship.

Most small businesses in India have just one objective: to get the maximum money out of the customer by all means possible. Fairness in business, Customer satisfaction, customer relationship, the possibility of repeat business and such values be damned. When I say small businesses, I refer to the stores and service shops where individuals go for such things as shopping for groceries and clothes, rent cars or vans for trips, etc.

These businesses just want to get the extra 2, 5, 10, 200 or 2000 rupees out of you. They are not bothered that they may leave you feeling disatisfied and cheated. They are not bothered that you get the best possible product or service for the money you paid. Small hitches and glitches are par for the course, and usually the customer has to pay for repair/suffer through the glitches. These stores and service shops are not bothered that you may not go back to them or that you may not refer other potential customers to them. They are not even bothered that you may spread the bad word about them. Why should they bother? With such a large population forming the customer base and competition from others in the same business world being so unorganized and often even non-existent, businesses are not worried. They will always find more bakras to squeeze the extra out of.

The apathy of the businesses towards customer satisfaction and customer relationships is particularly surprising considering the customers themselves are quite familiar with these values. Indian customers are as discerning about quality as any other customers in the world. And in a good business-customer relationship, Indian customers can be as loyal as anyone else, may be more so because of the inherent cultural attitudes. On a recent visit to Kaanchipuram, I found my uncle searching for the shop of an old lady who had sold him spices years ago. He still remembered that the spices she sold him then were good in quality and value for money, he still had good feelings for that business transaction and relationship established years ago. So, when he was back in that town now, he was looking for that same old lady. That is customer loyalty for you. And what's more, this time, my uncle had with him, at least 2-3 other potential customers for the old lady's spices. That is the value of repeat business and customer referral to a business. Alas, we did not find the old lady's shop.

Another recent experience was buying a bottle of a cool drink. The store charged me 2 bucks extra for the refrigerated drink! I could always buy the warm non-refrigerated bottle for the normal price. Most people drink soda cold, that's common knowledge. So, why does one have to pay extra to get a cold drink? The story doesn't stop there. After I paid and got the bottle, I found that it was hardly cold. Either cooler was not working or it had been in the cooler for less than an hour!

Indian small businesses are yet to realize that a large percentage of the profits of successful businesses, comes from repeat customers and customers who have been referred by other customers.

Most Indian businesses are run by individuals or by families. Kinda like the mom-and-pop setups. Most American businesses these days are run by corporations. One would expect that the stores run by individuals would have a better one-on-one relationship with customers. But when I compare American businesses and Indian businesses, I am quite surprised to see that on an average, the corporate-run businesses do a better job of establishing and maintaining good customer relationships, than the individual-run Indian businesses do! Capitalistic corporate conglomerates may have many negatives to them, but seen in this light, at least they seem to do a better job of providing the right value product/service for the customer's money.

Driving in Bangalore (and India)!

Posted on July 19, 2004 4:5 AM EST (from Bangalore, India)

Driving in Bangalore and most other places that I've been to this month during my vacation in India, is a MAJOR pain! There's just too many vehicles on the road and ALL of them driving with very little consideration for others and for the rules. As if that is not enough, the roads are in such bad condition. Bad is an adjective that doesn't even come close to describing the conditions of the roads in many parts of the city. Then, you have everybody, I mean, everybody - pedestrians of all ages, vehicles of all speeds and assorted animals - moving all over the road. And when it rains, things get several times worse.

It is a pain to ride even an easy vehicle like a Kinetic Honda, where you don't have to change gears. I don't know how people manage with manual transmission motorcyles and cars. Heck, I don't know how *I* rode an Enfield Bullet on these streets just a few years back! My friends and I, in a Maruti car, narrowly avoided a head-on collision with a truck, a few kilometers out of Bangalore on Mysore road, just last evening!

This post would amuse me cuz it sounds so much like stuff I used to read, written by Western writers about the crazy Indian roads. But things are so bad and such a pain, there is no room for humor or amusement here. These conditions are just too damn dangerous and inconvenient! It's distressing to think that, little or nothing is being done to improve these conditions, while a lot of things (like adding more vehicles to the roads daily) are happening to make them even worse!

My Colleague's Daughter Loves Me

Posted on April 23, 2004 17:3 PM EST

My colleague's daughter loves me. No doubt about it.

Last night we had gone out for dinner. She sat across the table from me. I was not in the best of moods. She was not well either. She was ill and in a bit of pain. She was grumpy and whiny for a few minutes in the beginning. Until she noticed me sitting across the table and looking at her. We stared at each other quietly for sometime. And then little by little she started to smile. Her smile grew gradually... like the Sun rising exquisitely slowly. She tried to hold back on the smile, probably because part of her remembered that she was not feeling well and that she was in pain somewhere.

But she could not resist my appreciative smiling look and my presence. She just had to smile. I burst out laughing at her attempts to hold back on the smile and she flashed her smile brilliantly, like the Sun that has finally risen completely. For the rest of the evening, we had a happy, giggling, chattering three-year-old baby among us.

My dark moods were gone too. I was happy and contented, knowing that this three-year-old loves me. Simply, naively, innocently, unjudgingly, acceptingly loves me. Loves me enough that she forgets her illness and pain and smiles just because I am there in her presence.

And when it was time to leave, she would not leave without expressing her love in some tangible way. When she got into her father's car, she called me in, wanting to give me something. She rummaged around in the various boxes and found a coin. And insisted that I take it. I said no, I have my own money, you keep it. I said no, it is your father's money, you keep it. But she screamed and pleaded for me to take it. I did not. It was just a 50 paise coin. Why did I feel such a resistance to accepting that coin from a child who loved me, just because it was money? What asses we grown-ups are!

And the kid is concerned for my happiness too. She asks her mom where my "aunty" is. She means my wife. And when her mom says I don't have an aunty, she asks if I live alone. She wants to know why I live alone, why I have no aunty, does nobody love me? And occasionally when we meet for dinner, she will ask me with great sympathy in her voice and expression if I live alone. Then, she will ask her parents if they can all come to my home, just because she thinks I am going back to my lonely home.

I am so blessed to find such sweet love and concern in a strange city, so far away from home. Apart from my family and the Goddess, this baby is perhaps the only person in my life right now, who loves me with such uncomplicated and uninhibited openness of the heart. Truly, the Goddess chooses well when she brings girls and women into my life!

If only more people could love with such an open heart! Our external lives, relationships, bodies have to conform to so many rules of love. Why tie up the heart and the mind and the soul too? Why not just let them love as they will, at least on the inside? Why not just let go and let love?

Ego, Ball and Balls

Posted on April 14, 2004 19:55 PM EST

Was talking chatting with this friend today and came up with an interesting analogy for the Ego.

EGO: IT's like a ball, man. Play around with it. And know that it's a game. And that it can always be blown up again... if it gets deflated. That's how you've to treat ego. Like a ball. Problem is some people treat it like it's their balls. Some fragile, delicate thing that can be easily hurt. And the corollary to Murphy's Law says: What can be hurt, will be hurt!

Let go and let Love

Posted on March 29, 2004 21:18 PM EST

I was thinking this morning...

Humans have made so much advancement over animals in fulfilling their basic needs of food, clothing, shelter. And for the sake of food, clothing, shelter and survival, they put rules around the most basic of all needs: Love.

They created rules that said whom to love, how to love, how much to love, how to show that love... so that there would be no conflicts and we would all live and survive.

This has led to a condition where there are wayyy too many of us who are not getting adequate love. Everyday we come across people who are malnourished or hungering for love.

Now that we have gone beyond the stage where survival is an issue... should we not throw out those rules and limitations?

Should we not just let go and let Love?

Libran Lover

Chai on your lips

Posted on March 22, 2004 14:10 PM EST

Chai on your lips

Let me dive my fingers into your hair
and mess it up good;
Let me feel you kiss my lips hard
and draw some hot blood;


Let me claim as mine the small of your back
and call it the Libran Lover Bosporus;
Let me have you mouth me with hunger
and make me melt delicious;


Let me help you in the kitchen with my mischievous hands
and in my own special ways;
Let me never know you fall asleep with troubles or grief,
and see only happiness fill all your days;


Let me offer you my shoulders in every hour of need,
and feel you grab my hands tight when our children are born;
Let me die in the bed which smells of you,
and that our love has outworn;


Let me gather you up in my arms
and keep you warm always;
Let me know the shelter of your love all life,
and in all the sweet, wonderful ways;


Let me fill you up with my passion and love from head to toes,
and to the ends of your finger tips;
Above all let me have the peace of coming home every evening,
and tasting the sweet chai on your lips!

Note to self

Posted on March 18, 2004 23:5 PM EST

Note to self: Man, love sucks! :-((

Rebuttal - Bangalore: Silicon Valley or Coolie Valley?

Posted on March 10, 2004 19:58 PM EST

Recently an article was published on rediff.com, which has generated much interest. It is being posted on online forums, forwarded as emails and talked about in many places. This is my rebuttal to that article.

You can read the original article here: Bangalore: Silicon Valley or Coolie Valley?

My rebuttal

When we call Bangalore as Silicon Valley of India, we don't mean Bangalore is a mirror image of the Silicon Valley in California. We are not claiming that we are doing the similar work or have the same attitude or culture or even business volumes as the Silicon Valley. What we mean is, Bangalore is to India, what Silicon Valley is or was to the US.

But I agree that we don't have to name ourselves after some other place. We can and should create our own identity. And we ARE doing that.

Having said that, let me answer each point in this guy's summary.

He writes: Don't call your city Silicon Valley ('pub city' or 'garden city', I have no problem with -- lots of pubs and lots of trees, but very little silicon).

Libran Lover: The Silicon Valley culture and work did not come up overnight. There were several factors: the spirit of entrepreneurship that has always existed across the US, the strong financial and technical base coupled with proximity of the client base, the greater risk-taking attitude of Americans as compared to Indians, and few other factors. The technology industry in Bangalore is still growing. Bangalore might never come to resemble Silicon Valley, but Bangalore will probably surpass Silicon Valley in it's own way and style.

He writes: Don't call one of your new software companies a 'high technology start-up.'

Libran Lover: Granted that most of our start-ups don't probably jump into 'high technology' right away. There are surely exceptions that do. However, most of us start in tried, true and predictable areas. Then build up from there. That is the Indian way. That is why Bangalore's glory will live long past Silicon Valley's. Bangalore will be more resilient than Silicon Valley. BUT, today there ARE companies in Bangalore (Indian-owned and foreign-owned) that are doing work in cutting edge technologies. And more Bangalore companies are joining the fray all the time. No questions about that. If the author claims otherwise, he doesn't know enough.

He writes: Don't call your engineers 'techies.' They've forgotten their engineering long ago.

Libran Lover: Again, the author doesn't seem to know enough. Bangalore techies or techies employed by companies operating out of Bangalore (Wipro, Infosys, etc.) are involved in engineering activities - in Bangalore and across the world. Not only software engineering, but also engineering new hardware designs. Not only computer hardware, but also consumer electronics, automobiles, etc. And we have already ventured into frontier areas like bio technologies, nano technologies, etc. These are happening in Bangalore.

He writes: Don't say you've invested in 'tech stocks' ('body stocks' maybe ?).

Libran Lover: The above points I have mentioned imply that we are not just about body stocks. Is there an undercurrent of sarcasm in the author's tone when he writes this? I hope not. People have proved to be India's best assets. We grew up learning in schools and colleges that population is India's biggest problem. Young Indians are turning this theory upside down. In this century, we will prove that the population of India turned out to be India's biggest advantage. It is India's young population - you and I, our friends and nephews and nieces and children - who will be the main fuel for India's growth. India's "bodies" will influence the whole world in coming decades in ways that we can't even imagine now.

There will always be pessimists and nay sayers. Let's listen to what they say - after all, they identify our weak areas. Then let's try to improve those areas. No need to get discouraged. And no need to stop cheering ourselves either. If we have something nice going, let's flaunt it. Bangalore did not become Bangalore just like that. It became what it is today because of the wonderful open-minded, welcoming, progressive attitudes of Bangaloreans. It has always been that way in Bangalore. We are proud of that and we hope to keep it that way in the future.

I have read reports that said: If you left out rest of India and considered only the economic growth of South India during the past few years, we have been growing at a rate faster than the famed "Asian Tiger" countries. No points for guessing that a significant chunk of that economic growth has come from Bangalore. Instead of comparing what we do with what is or was done in Silicon Valley and then looking down on us, it would be better for the rest of India to see how they can improve in their own ways, in their own areas, according to their own strengths. We used our progressive attitudes and the value we give to academic education to get where we are now. Let other areas tap their own good points and come up too. Then our country as a whole can beat any country in the world. That is what is required.

Good luck and all the best.

---

PS: A reader Nahusha wrote to me: Bangalore is not located in a Valley. It is located on the Deccan Plateau. So Bangalore should be called the Silicon Plateau of the World.

Sexist World

Posted on February 20, 2004 20:58 PM EST

We definitely live in a sexist world. I was listening to the radio this afternoon. Advertisement for some bar or pub. Ladies get in free all night and special drinks prices for ladies only! Cover charge for guys after 10 PM!

Imagine how much trouble the pub would have had from feminists and other groups, if it did the opposite - charge extra for ladies. Not to mention the fact that it would run out of business because of boycott by the ladies.

The word sexist is usually used and get lot of attention in situations where women are at a disadvantage. In all other situations - be it something as simple as a gentleman opening a door for a lady to something like doors in many places and stages of life opening magically for a lady (especially if she is pretty) - sexist behavior or discrimination is hardly mentioned.

Most pretty ladies probably go through their entire lives without knowing how difficult some simple things can be for the rest of us. Whether it is getting work done at a government office or influencing a bunch of people to go with a certain plan for a holiday activity or enlisting someone's help for anything, on a typical day, things just happen for them. I don't envy their ease or the many unwanted attentions and advances they have to endure. But I do wish that the stupid obstacles would not come up in the path of hairy beasts like yours truly... especially in places like government offices.

Bottomline is, as long as there are different sexes in the world, sexist behavior and discrimination will exist. It is ok. It is ok as long as it benefits people. It is not ok if it harms them. It is ok if a pretty girl breezes through the process of getting a driver's license. It is not ok if the lecherous government official held up my processing just because he did not like my face. It is okay if my grandmother feeds me a couple more idlis than I want because she believes I should grow up into a strong boy. It is not okay if she feeds my sister a couple less idlis than she wants just because she is a girl.

We are different genders. Let us accept the fact. Let us accept the countless things - big and small - that make us different. Let us celebrate the differences. Let us accept the positive consequences of those differences. And let us address the negative behavior and practices with empathy and open mind and love. Let us have the love to accept certain things that cannot be changed. Above all, let us not forget that, as the yin-yang symbol shows, there is a little bit of the other gender in all of us.

Reminder to Self

Posted on February 19, 2004 22:3 PM EST

Reminder to Self: Don't pine in vain over an Indian woman.

The Dance of Two and One

Posted on February 18, 2004 19:21 PM EST

I once had this friend complain to me about how guys are so nice and caring in the wooing stage, and how once they get the girl and are in a relationship, they become selfish and bother only about their own needs. Following is the letter I wrote to her.

27th Aug ’99

The Dance of Two and One

Hello P,

The day after I talked to you in mid-July, I was thinking about the various things you’d said concerning guys and selfishness, and I came up with a good analogy. I find it so good that, I can’t resist sharing it with you. Hence this letter.

Well, the analogy is that of a dance, an intensely physical activity. Though this analogy is physical, know that it can be scaled up and down to other levels of a relationship – mental, emotional, spiritual; in fact, to the whole relationship itself. I am limiting myself here to the guy-girl relationship. May be we could apply it with/without some modification to guy-guy and girl-girl relationships too.

Now, where do I start? Okay, I personally don’t know if it’s true, but it’s generally considered that the natural instinct of the feminine body is to submit, to get down and under, to give in, to be uh, soft and warm, and the natural instinct of the male body is to dominate, to get on and on top, to take, to be hard and hot. Even if it’s not true, whether we agree or not, we have enough people behaving as if it’s true!

When a feminine body and a masculine one come close together, it’s like two dancers coming together on the dance floor. However, when these two bodies come close, the instinct that I’ve mentioned in the previous paragraph takes over. Whatever the reasons for this could be – be it the sheer physical proximity, or be it the years of mental conditioning, or something else, the two people end up indulging in what I call the Dance of One. It’s a dance in which the two bodies come together to become one, to move and feel and act and enjoy as one.

I refuse to believe that a girl and a guy come together only to dance the dance of one. However, when this happens, when they repeatedly indulge in just the dance of one, when the two bodies do just what they are supposed to do according to the instincts and definitions of their gender, both the guy and the girl would soon get bored and feel unfulfilled. I can assure you that even if they used every technique and position and posture that has been invented and discovered, from the times of the Kamasutra to the modern times, they will still not be satisfied. Though they follow the natural instinct of their bodies, the purpose for which they came together was not just that; I would like to think that there’s also another thing, something called the Dance of Two.

When I say dance, I am talking about not any one particular form of dance. It’s rather a combination of everything – the discipline and control of classical dance forms, the tight co-ordination and grace of ballet, the formality of a ball dance, the skill, speed and balance of acrobatics and gymnastics, the basic earthiness of tribal and folk dances, and a lot of other things, from a lot of other dance forms. For want of a better word, I call it the Dance of Life. And, this dance of life is made of both the dance of two and the dance of one.

The dance of two involves a good understanding of one’s own body and that of the partner. Each person should understand just how much s/he can stretch herself/himself and how much the partner can stretch. Each should know what their own body, and what their partner’s body can and cannot do. Each should have a sense of her/his own movement, speed and balance, as well as that of the partner. Each should know just how far s/he can go away from the partner without the dance turning into a couple of solo performances happening simultaneously.

Both should never forget where one begins and the other ends, what each one’s limitations are, boundaries are. There must be an awareness of what to expect from the partner, and what not to expect. There must be perfect understanding of who should place the next step, and where. There must be no confusion with one partner placing her/his foot on the spot where the other partner should have, no violation at all of the personal spaces. There must be a studied and totally conscious management of the distance and spacing between the bodies – at times so close as to appear as one body, at times just holding hands, at times so far that even the finger tips of outstretched hands barely touch, and at times not touching at all.

Both should be deeply aware of and understand the music to which they are performing. They must be able to change their movements as the music changes, with co-ordination, in unison. By their movements, they must be able to signal the musicians what type of music they would like next. They must also be able to take the challenge of dancing to any type of music the musicians may come up with.

I feel that only when two people learn all these nuances of the dance of two, they can successfully indulge in the dance of one, to share pleasure, to give satisfaction, and not to mention, to evoke a sweet desire for more.

It’s sad that usually, two people who actually come together to dance the Dance of Life, involving both the dance of two and the dance of one, very often rush to the dance of one without properly mastering the dance of two. The result is that they are neither fully aware of their own body nor their partner’s body nor the interaction between the two. And so, they can hardly give or get the kind of unique pleasure and satisfaction they need and deserve. In such a situation, there can hardly be any desire for more. The guy might look like a selfish pig who treats the girl like a slave, and/or, the girl might start to seem like a bitch who revels in giving him a bad time. Either the relationship breaks or goes into a state of compromise, with a lot of potential and need sadly unfulfilled.

You can easily substitute the mind, the emotions, the spirit or the complete person in place of the body in the above paragraphs and see that all of this still holds, for two people in a relationship. By dance, I mean all the things that we do with our partner, and by music, I mean all the events and things that happen in life, events and things to which we react and respond with our partner.

Let’s first learn to dance the dance of two, and then move on to the dance of one. This is one place where two should come before one. Let’s first know our self and our partner, and the interaction between us, and then we can think of combining everything into a beautiful dance of one.

Happy learning and happy dancing!

For Beauty’s Sake,
Libran Lover

Feminine Astrology

Posted on February 17, 2004 23:42 PM EST

Note: All of the following is written from personal experience.

Aries - If your Aries girl is even a little bit attractive, there's a good chance that she's got a fan following. So, be ready for competition. Don't get jealous if she shows interest in seemingly macho men, like movie and sports stars. They like to dominate, but they also have a respect for you if you dominate them. If you dominate them too much, they might just leave you. They can also get bored easily. If an Aries female is interested in you, you should feel very flattered.

Taurus - These girls tend to be very sweet and dependable. Good to settle down, make a family and have babies with. Sensible girls. Can be very stubborn - to the point of appearing foolish or closed-minded. Like I said, their greatest plus is that they are good wife material. And I mean that in the most sincere and affectionate way.

Gemini - Another group I like. But you got to be careful with these girls. Especially the ones who are not too evolved in terms of honesty, honor, principles and other such old-fashioned stuff. It's difficult to argue with them. They can deceive you quite easily. They can also sting quite effectively with their attitude and words, sometimes unintentionally. Hard to impress, really. If you can impress a smart Gemini girl, you really have some stuff in you.

Cancer - With this girl, at times be prepared either to be her parent or her child. It is true! Be also prepared to hear sob stories. Be prepared to laugh like crazy. If they say they know cooking, let them cook for you - you won't be disappointed. They like quality treatment and will reciprocate the same. They are also leaders. Because of their penchant to take care of others, you might sometimes have to compete with a bunch of people who are being taken care of by your Cancer girl.

Leo - These expect to be treated like royalty. If you are not a flamboyant type or a devil-may-care type yourself, some of these females can actually give you a nagging feeling that you lack something. By the same token if you can get one of these to be devoted to you, she will make you feel like you are a bigger and better person than you really are! Nice boost to the ego! They know how to give praise, when they want to. And usually, they also know how to put you down. A badly evolved Leo girl can be a tyrannical b*tch!

Virgo - These are nice too. You cannot play tricks with them. Though they might enjoy all that you do, enjoy all the flirting and even reciprocate, you will ONLY get what they want to give you. Cannot coax them into giving more. They usually know your exact measure pretty quickly. These are dependable too.

Libra - These females can sometimes be strange. Librans are usually known for their high intelligence. Perhaps that is why the occasional ones with average intelligence actually look duller than they really are. Most of these girls have an obvious masculine streak in their personality. By masculine I mean one or more of the following: dominant, leader, mentally and physically strong, confident, etc. They make good friends. They can also be pretty flirtatious, and/or have a fan following because they are so sweet and nice and smart and often sensible. This is another group who will give you reasons to be jealous. These can also get bored easily.

Scorpio - These girls can be quite possessive. And they usually know everything about you. And all those stories about Scorpio passion is true, and it is especially true about Scorpio females. But if they are cold, there's no hope, none at all. Don't do anything bad to them - it will hurt them pretty deeply. I hear that they can get back at you quite effectively, but I have not experienced that. Fighting with them can be a tiresome experience, though.

Sagittarius - These make great buddies. Good fun. Chances are, some people might not have treated them very well. You don't be one of them. There is a good chance that you might forget they are girls and start thinking of them as one of your buddies - stop, hold yourself back, treat them like ladies. They will enjoy the experience and you won't regret it - in fact, you will be glad. They have got a real fire inside... Mmmmm! Last year I realized that almost all of my life, there has been some Sagi girl close to me, in one form or the other.

Capricorn - They can be so sweet and down-to-Earth and understanding and reasonable. They make great team-mates. Very dependable, no-nonsense types. Among all the girls I have met, a Capricornian is the one that came closest to convincingly making me feel that I could actually share a whole lifetime with her!

Aquarius - These make good buddies too. A really unique group. Can't generalize! I like them.

Pisces - Feels good to be around these girls. Unless they are a really weak type, in which case, you might end up with more pity than anything else. A really good Piscean can be very alluring and make you get addicted of her. Good people to spend time with when you are tired, and just want some quiet time.

One thing that's common with all the signs - it's good to have her on your side in bad situation.

Dogs

Posted on February 16, 2004 23:0 PM EST

Hello Friends,

I would like to write about a subject that is quite frequently on my mind - dogs.

I have often heard people say that man is a social being. No doubt man is a social being, but the way in which it is said seems to imply that man has exclusive right to a social structure. But the truth is that there are lots of others who are also social beings like women, ants, dolphins, bees, almost all herbivorous wild animals, and lots of other animals including, wolves and the descendants of wolves, the dogs. And many of them have a much better social structure than men - even if they may not be as evolved mentally.

Well, having made that point, I would not like to give you the standard lines about the joys of having a dog in the house, the absolute devotion and friendship of these creatures, etc. I would rather concentrate on those points which unfortunately don’t find adequate mention in most general discussions about dogs.

Before we go further, let’s all remember that dogs have evolved from wolves and, like wolves, dogs are pack animals in the wild. Now on to the first point.

The first point is about the way you the dog thinks of you and you think of the dog. Always remember that a dog looks on you and your family as other dogs of the pack. So, we should not reciprocate and treat the dog as a human child. I mean, a dog deserves and should be given the same amount of love and care that are given to children, but as it grows, you should not expect it to understand what’s good behavior and bad behavior the way you would expect a human child to. The dog is much more sensitive than humans, very impressionable, and starts learning from the day it’s born. Consciously or unconsciously, it continuously learns from us. So, we must be very careful how we behave around and treat young dogs.

The second point is about the dog’s position in the pack, in the family. Most pack animals exhibit a very strict hierarchy in the pack - wolves and dogs are no exceptions. A pack is generally made of one alpha male, it’s mate an alpha female and lots of other lesser animals. The lowest member of the pack is called the omega. Every member has a distinct role to play in the pack, and the dominance of the alpha is absolute, once he’s established himself as alpha. The alpha member doesn’t become an alpha member just like that, or by birth - it has to practical fight for that position from a very young age. Most of the time, the fight is psychological rather than physical. It’s instinctual for dogs, which are also very territorial, protective and possessive animals to try and dominate. A dog in a family, especially a big dog like a German Shepherd or a Great Dane could be a time bomb waiting to explode if allowed to get away with the dominant behavior during puppyhood.

I’ve mentioned a dog looks at us like members of a pack - as such, it is very important for the human family members to establish themselves higher up in the hierarchy than the dog. There are many ways of doing it, and it should be done from the very first day the pup comes to your house, no matter how young it is. Some of the ways of establishing dominance include: rolling over the dog on it’s back and scratching it’s tummy, holding him between your hands or legs and grooming it’s neck from behind, handling it’s food bowl, etc. These things should never be tried on an adult dog which is unfamiliar with these treatments. Rather, these things should be done right from puppyhood.

There will definitely come a day, when the puppy will challenge you when you try to do this, even if you’ve been doing it from the day you got the puppy. When there is even a slight hint of challenge there must be immediate and firm correction. Correction should always be consistent with the puppy - meaning what is bad behavior today should always be bad behavior. You can’t allow the puppy to sleep on the sofa today and punish it when it does the same thing tomorrow - you may not be consistent in your personal life, but please, please be consistent with your dog, always.

There are many ways of correcting dog - but it’s important to remember that correction doesn’t mean hitting the dog or causing it pain or harm. For young puppies, a rough shout/growl should suffice. If that doesn’t work and you really want to give a firm correction, do what parent dogs do to puppies. Very very carefully, catch hold of the scruff of the puppies neck, very gently lift or shake the puppy - it will squeal, carefully release it. When I mention ‘carefully’ and ‘gently’, I don’t mean slowly. This should be done as soon as you see the puppy doing something you don’t want it to do (including challenge you dominance).

Finally these talks of dominance should not puff up our ego or affect our humility. We should always remember that there are few things about dogs that make them better “persons” than we humans will ever be. Best wishes to all dogs and their families. Thank you.

Hickey on the Hip

Posted on February 14, 2004 22:3 PM EST

Hickey on the Hip a.k.a. Wooed by The Beast

With earnest attentions
And responsible actions,
With straight talks
And simple truths - he wooed me;
I admired and I applauded, but I resisted.

With laughing stories
And scandalous poems,
With hinting winks
And mischievous grins - he wooed me;
I giggled and I flirted, but I resisted.

With meaningless words
And meaningful silences,
With deep eyes
And soulful sighs - he wooed me;
I stared and I sighed, but I resisted.

With fingers that messed my hair,
And nails that danced down my spine,
With stares that traced my curves
And looks that caressed my skin - he wooed me;
I shook and I shivered, but I resisted.

He said, "You are my Beauty,"
And with both hands grabbed my booty,
He planted a deep kiss crushing my lip
And burnt a hot hickey right on my hip,
I moaned and I swooned, and I became his!

The Sleep Goddess's Blessed Child

Posted on February 12, 2004 23:54 PM EST

If there is one thing about me that I cannot absolutely control, it is sleep. If my body needs to sleep, it will sleep. Period. No matter where I am, what I am doing. The only thing that can keep me from sleeping is cold. Hate it.

I am envious of animals for the many simplicities of their lives. But the one thing that I am most envious about them is their freedom to sleep just about whenever they want to. They are totally in sync with their bodies. Not tied to some artificial clock.

Without further ado, here are a list of places I have fallen asleep in. Contrary to the light tone of this piece, I am not proud of this list.

1. Classrooms. Of course. Not just in school or college classrooms. Even in my company's training rooms. During one multi-day training, the instructor got so used to my daily post-lunch naps, on one occasion he exclaimed in front of the whole class with an amused and resigned smile on his face, "So, Swami is doing his usual work now!"

2. At my office desk. Of course again. Not just in my own company's office desk. Even in client companies. I have dozed off in the middle of typing an email or editing a program. Othertimes, I have dropped my head on the desk, tucked in my arms and simply dozed off. Nobody has objected... yet!

3. Meetings. Of course yet again. I have dozed off in meetings. Even in clients' organizations. Even in a technical review meeting with just 3 people, including myself. People have been extremely sportive about it. Absolutely hate meetings within 90 minutes after lunch.

4. In the middle of dinner. If this happened at home, my mom would take my plate, feed me with her own hand, and send me off to sleep. Ah, mom!

5. In front of the TV. Someone would wake up early in the morning and find that I had dozed off with the TV on the whole night!

6. At the movies. Simple. Dark place. Boring or not so boring movie. Doze off.

7. While on the phone or Net, chatting with friends. More than one gal has been frustrated and angry. Sorry, babes!

8. While driving. Ridiculous. Dangerous. Stupid. I dozed off the very first time I was driving in the US. The car almost ran into the other lane when my friend, who was teaching me the nuances of driving in the US, squealed. I corrected at once. To this day he does not know I dozed off. Thinks I just lost the steering balance. I have dozed off on other occasions while driving. By some strange coincidence, everytime I have to go on a long drive, it so happens that I've had little sleep the previous night. Stopped at rest areas on many occasions to take a nap and then drive on. I had this one girlfriend who lived 40 miles away. If I stayed over at her home and we stayed up late (as it happened often!), I would have to drive back home early in the morning to get ready for work. It's that time of the day when sleep is best and hard to resist. We had an agreement that as soon as I reached home, I would leave her a message that I had reached safely. Else, she should panic and raise the alarm. Crore thanks to Tirupati Edukondalavada that I am anti-accident prone!

9. Falling asleep while making out. Yeah. Unlike most men, I am not the kind who falls asleep immediately after I have had my pleasure. If I get into the act, I do my part for my hunni. It's the foreplay time when I am most vulnerable. On long, tiring days, I have been known to fall asleep during the foreplay, right in mid-kiss, mid-squeeze or mid-sweet-nothing. Frustrating for my hunni. Sorry, hunni!

10. Surprisingly, dozing off while driving or during foreplay is not my worst yet. My worst is falling asleep while on a last date! Oh, mama! How could I do that? I did. For reasons I can't go into here, it was supposed to be my last date with this sweet sweet friend. We went back to her home after dinner, sat on the couch, she was in my arms, head on my shoulder, and then I dozed off! No last sweet words. No last hugs and kisses. No nostalgic reminiscences. Hers truly, Sleepy-head Swami, just dozed off! She was so sweet and good and understanding, after I woke up, she sent me home with a hug and a kiss. Fortunately, things took a different turn and it ended up not being our last date, after all. In fact, we went on to enjoy a deeper and sweeter relationship. Warm hugs and kisses to my sweetie!

List not complete...

PS: There are a few friends who have suggested that my tendency to sleep might be a medical syndrome that needs treatment. I think not. Simply because everytime I have fallen asleep like that, I have usually been up too late the previous night for whatever reason and/or I have just had a filling lunch/dinner.